The Good, the Bad and the Smug

Only please, do be careful to bear in mind that Mordak’s a goblin. Enlightened, yes, but a goblin. He likes his employees loyal or lightly steamed on a bed of bruised rocket.

He turned and gave the Dark Elf a nasty look. “They can do that,” he said, “mess with your head, using arcane mind control techniques. Well-known fact.” The Dark Elf sniggered. “I wish,” he said. “Sadly, no. You’re thinking of journalism, which is slightly different.

After all, why be right when you can be happy.

He believes it’s time to redesign Evil from the ground up; to face the challenges and opportunities of a diverse, rapidly changing society. “He’s thinking of calling it,” said Miss Gold, “New Evil.

There comes a time when a man must stand up and do what he knows is Wrong.

And if I’ve got to die, I want to die an editor.

Look not for too long into the doughnut, lest the doughnut look into you.

The doughnut was definitely looking at him. Hello, sailor, it seemed to be saying.

Mordak has the mental clarity to recognise that when it comes to running a bureaucracy, Elves can achieve a degree of blinkered ruthlessness that makes goblins look like teddy-bears.

He could hear rain pattering on the thatch, like a million mice line-dancing.

Mr Winckler clapped his hands together. “Evil, as personified by me. Meet the new Dark Lord. But you can call me Albert.