Groucho Marx · 272 pages
Rating: (329 votes)
“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
“I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
“Die, my dear? Why that's the last thing I'll do!”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
“Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
“I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
“In a Chicago cafe the other night, an elderly man passed a table.
“There goes George,” observed an onlooker. “When he was young, he was a handsome guy and had many companies. Left a wife and two kids to starve, and ran off with another woman. And now look at him. Old, broke and very sad.”
“That’s the way-it-goes,” nodded Elly Kleinman. “Time wounds all heels.”
― Groucho Marx, quote from The Essential Groucho: Writings By, For, and about Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx
Born place: in New York , New York, The United States
Born date October 2, 1890
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“You were half a second away from saying we’re the villains in our story!” May”
― James Riley, quote from Half Upon a Time
“One day,” was the dark reply, “I will find the Ripper, and you will prove it with your life.”
“I hope that is not a threat against my person, sir, verily I do.” The auctioneer was all of a quiver. “I shall not endure that sort of talk in my wife's very own auction house, sir. Judith would never have allowed such wanton verbal abuse, sir.”
“Where's you wife's spirit?” a medium shouted. 'Shall we auction her off, too?'
Didion purpled like a bruise. You knew things were getting serious when Didion Waite ran out of sirs.”
― Samantha Shannon, quote from The Mime Order
“We should be choosing what we want to keep, not what we want to get rid of.”
― Marie Kondō, quote from The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing
“This is where they keep the dreams about the end of the world, according to the inhabitants of places where the winters are very windy.”
― Ismail Kadare, quote from The Palace of Dreams
“Maté The moon was simply dying to tread the earth. She wanted to sample the fruit and to bathe in some river. Thanks to the clouds, she was able to come down. From sunset until dawn, clouds covered the sky so that no one could see the moon was missing. Nighttime on the earth was marvelous. The moon strolled through the forest of the high Paranà, caught mysterious aromas and flavors, and had a long swim in the river. Twice an old peasant rescued her. When the jaguar was about to sink his teeth into the moon’s neck, the old man cut the beasts throat with his knife; and when the moon got hungry, he took her to his house. “We offer you our poverty,” said the peasant’s wife, and gave her some corn tortillas. On the next night the moon looked down from the sky at her friends’ house. The old peasant had built his hut in a forest clearing very far from the villages. He lived there like an exile with his wife and daughter. The moon found that the house had nothing left in it to eat. The last corn tortillas had been for her. Then she turned on her brightest light and asked the clouds to shed a very special drizzle around the hut. In the morning some unknown trees had sprung up there. Amid their dark green leaves appeared white flowers. The old peasant’s daughter never died. She is the queen of the maté and goes about the world offering it to others. The tea of the maté awakens sleepers, activates the lazy, and makes brothers and sisters of people who don’t know each other. (86”
― Eduardo Galeano, quote from Genesis
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