“I lose my head when I’m with you.”
… “And I find myself when I’m with you.”
“Fall with me,” I whispered.
He leaned down, lips just brushing mine, and Zachary Kennedy murmured his truth.
“I already jumped.”
“Sometimes it gets old, living in the shadows. Somehow they’re not quite so dark when you’re around.”
“Tell me you need me, Alexis. Tell me you need this as fucking bad as I do. Tell me it’s okay. Tell me I’m not the only one who’s losing his mind.” The words grated, rugged and fuelled by need.
Emotion thickened in my throat, so heavy, so right. “I need you.”
The last threads of whatever was holding Zee back snapped.”
“Guess I imagined being a part of a feeling that could be brought to life in people’s imaginations and eyes”
“This man, who’d rushed in to hold together all the splintering pieces of my world and forced them back together before they were completely destroyed and unrepairable.
I felt bound to him in an unfathomable way.
As if when he’d been holding those splintering pieces together, the man had managed to chip away a small piece of my soul. A piece that would permanently belong to him.”
“I want things that will only ruin me, Alexis. But you…you make me want to wish for them anyway. Make me believe there’s a chance that maybe they could belong to me.”
“Fuck…Alexis…Lex. I need you…God, I need you so bad I can’t fucking see.”
“I think I want you more than anything I’ve ever wanted. Not in all my life.”
“Chains were a bitch. But sometimes they were the only things tying us to what was most important.”
“That’s the thing, Alexis. I see you looking at me the way you do. Like we could be somethin’. And I want it so fucking bad. To be something to you. To be good for you. But I ruined that possibility a long time ago and I’m not sure there are enough pieces left to give any of them to you. That’s my truth.”
“Can’t get you out of my mind, Lex. Doesn’t matter how hard I try, I can’t get you out. You’ve gotten under my skin. So deep. So fucking deep.”
My fingers sank into the bristling muscle of his shoulders. “Why would you want to stop thinking of me? Don’t you feel this?”
His voice was pained. “Don’t you get it yet? That’s the problem. I feel everything. I want you so goddamned bad, and I can’t ever have you.”
“You make me want to be better. You…you make me forget. Make me forget who I am.”
… “Maybe you’re just remembering who you are. Who you were always supposed to be.”
… He groaned, half pained, half demand. “You almost make me feel like him.”
“Is that what you feel? Like you’re invisible?” That connection I didn’t understand flamed within my chest. Building and intensifying. “Because you’re the only thing I see.” He flinched. “That’s the problem with all of this.”
“There are some things you need to know.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m dealing with the fact that you may walk away from me once you know them and never look back. It scares the hell out of me. I don’t know what this is that is going on between us but from the moment I laid eyes on you I knew you were going to change my world. I was terrified. The more I watched you the more you drew me in. I couldn’t get close enough.”
“Because in the late twentieth century, you couldn't seriously ask other people to think that you believed in honor and truth, and the purity of the body, the defense of women, the sanctity of true love, and all the rest of it.
But apparently, Andre really had believed it.”
“She'd become a governess. It was one of the few jobs a known lady could do.
And she'd taken to it well. She'd sworn that if she did indeed ever find
herself dancing on rooftops with chimney sweeps she'd beat herself to death with her own umbrella.”
“I still get nightmares. In fact, I get them so often I should be used to them by now. I'm not. No one ever really gets used to nightmares.”
“el individuo siente, la comunidad se resiente -citó Lenina.”
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