Quotes from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys

268 pages

Rating: (31.4K votes)


“Boys are unpredictable. This maybe not be news, but I'm starting to think it's one of the best things about them.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“All I know is, he found out you left and he locked himself in the shed and barricaded the door. No one's seen him since," Doug said. "When I bolted, Sean and Evan were trying to boost Caleb up onto the roof so he could look through the skylight and make sure the kid wasn't dead or something.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Boys do tell you how they really feel. I think you just have to be in the right place at the right time or maybe be the right person”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“So are you comin' back with me or what?"

Megan lifted her head and sighed. "I have a few conditions."

"Shoulda known," Doug said, rolling his eyes.

"First of all, I did not sign up for a truck stop bathroom," Megan said. "You guys need to start cleaning up after yourselves in there. No more blood, no more hair, no more stains that I don't even want to identify."

"All right, all right," Doug said. "That it?"

"Hardly," Megan said. "I want a hands-off rule on all my stuff. Including my bike."

"Okay..."

"And I want everyone to stop calling me Megan C Cups behind my back."

Doug's jaw went slack as he flushed. "How did you know about that?"

Megan raised her eyebrows.

"All right, fine.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Evan stopped completely. He was staring at her with those intense eyes. Staring right into her. Just like he had in those couple of moments when she had thought for a split second, that he wanted to kiss her.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys



“Observation #3: They gossip.

Can you believe it? I overheard Finn and Doug in the backyard talking about some girl named Dawn who blew off some guy named Simon for some other guy named Rick for like twenty minutes! They sounded like those old mole-hair ladies at Sal's Milshakes.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“One more thing," Megan said, stopping Doug in his tracks.

His shoulders slumped and he turned around. "What? You want my kidney?"

"I want in on the next ultimate Frisbee game," Megan said.

Doug grinned. "You're playing skins."

Megan grinned back. "We'll see about that.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Finally Doug broke the stalemate and looked at Megan.

"Thanks a lot," he said sarcastically. Then he yanked off his plastic gloves, tossed them at her feet, and stormed away.

Finn let out a sigh as he gazed after his brother. "You know, my parents really should have stopped with me.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“They both fought to catch their breath, though Megan's oxygen deprivation had nothing to do with the game.

"You okay?" Finn asked.

"Yeah, you?" she replied. Every inch of her body was throbbing to touch him again.

"Yeah," he replied with a huge grin. He pushed himself around and got on all fours in front of her, pausing there with his face inches from hers. "I'm glad you stayed," he whispered, his breath warm on her face.

Megan somehow managed to reply. "Me too."

Then Finn pushed himself up and headed back toward the centre of the yard. For a moment, Megan couldn't move. Then Doug walked over and offered his arm. Megan grasped it thankfully and he yanked up to her shaky legs.

"Who's all in a twist now?" he asked with a smirk.

Megan laughed and shoved him from behind as they headed back to the line.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Observation #8: Boys are icky.

Do not even get me started on the state of the bathroom. I'm thinking of calling in a haz-mat team. Seriously.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys



“So, look, you can't leave," Doug said, sitting straight up and turning towards her. "if you do, Miller's gonna revert and Caleb and Ian are gonna ride roughshod and Sean'll go back to being ghost brother and Finn..."
Megan's heart slipped. "Finn what?"
"Finn will be destroyed," Doug said, looking her in the eye. "You got that dude all up in a twist, you know that, right?"
"What does that even mean?" Megan asked.
"All's I know is, he found out you left and he locked himself in the shed and barricaded the door. No one's seen him since," Doug said. "When I bolted, Sean and Evan were trying to boost Caleb up onto the roof so he could look through the skylight and make sure the kid wasn't dead or something."
Megan swallowed hard. "Wow.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Boys everywhere. All seven of them plus their dad, running and laughing and shoving each other around on the front lawn, engaged in what appeared to be a full-contact, tackle version of ultimate Frizbee. They were playing shirts and skins. Shirts and might-fine-lookin' skins.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“TooDamn-Funky: It's a start, ok. Been thinking bout the boyz. 'member last year my bro did that immersion thing in Venezuela?
Kciker5525: Where he learned to speak Spanish???
TooDamn-Funky: Yeah! u go for 2 weeks talk nothing but Spanish u come back fluent.
Kicker5535: ...????
TooDamn-Funky: Well this is like a guy immersion program!
Kicker5525: So...what. I'm going 2 b fluent in GUY?
TooDamn-Funky: Exactly! u will c what they talk about alone. U will c how they r with each other. U will c how they THINK!! AND WHEN IT'S DONE YOU'LL BE ABLE TO WRITE A GUY GUIDE BOOK!!
Kicker5525: U r deranged.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Megan could have kissed him. If there weren't a million obstacles, both physical and psychological, in her way, of course.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Hey,” Finn said, glancing over his shoulder. He had the end of a paintbrush clenched between his teeth. “You’re just in time.”
“For what?” she asked as she slipped inside.
“My nervous breakdown,” Finn said with a wry smile, dropping his paintbrush onto the easel’s shelf. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes and sat down on an old garden bench that was pushed up against the wall. “I suck. Did you know that you are in the presence of a person who completely and utterly sucks?”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys



“you guys all suck you know that?" Meagan shouted, flinging open the door of the shed.
Finn dropped his paintbrush on the leg of his jeans where it left a streak of orange before hitting the dirty floor.
"sorry?" he said.
"you!you suck!" Meagan fumed.
"we've been over this. I know I suck."
"not your art.you!you...guys" Meagan shouted.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“So, look, you can’t leave,” Doug said, sitting up straight and turning toward her. “If you do, Miller’s gonna revert and Caleb and Ian are gonna ride roughshod and Sean’ll go back to being Ghost Brother and Finn…”
Megan’s heart slipped. “Finn what?”
“Finn will be destroyed,” Doug said, looking her in the eye. “You got that dude all up in a twist, you know that, right?”
“What does that even mean?” Megan asked.
“All’s I know is, he found out you left and he locked himself in the shed and barricaded the door. No one’s seen him since,” Doug said. “When I bolted, Sean and Evan were trying to boost Caleb up onto the roof so he could look through the skylight and make sure the kid wasn’t dead or something.”
Megan swallowed hard. “Wow.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“I wanted to tell you both that I’m leaving for Korea,” Megan announced. “In about half an hour.”
Evan’s jaw dropped and Doug froze in his tracks. He turned around slowly and plastered a smile on his face. “Finally,” he said.
“Yeah, well, before I go, there’s something I want to say to you guys,” Megan said.
“Famous last words?” Doug asked sarcastically.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“We always thought it was cool that my mom only had boys, you know? Doug said, for once dropping his gangsta accent. “Who knew that we actually needed a sister?”
Megan looked down at her hands.
“Oh, man! Are you gonna go all blubbery on my ass?” Doug asked.
Megan laughed. “No.”
“So are you comin’ back with me or what?”
Megan lifted her head and sighed. “I have a few conditions.”
“Shoulda known,” Doug said, rolling his eyes.
“First of all, I did not sign up for a truck stop bathroom,” Megan said. “You guys need to start cleaning up after yourselves in there. No more blood, no more hair, no more random stains that I don’t even want identified.”
“All right, all right,” Doug said. “That it?”
“Hardly,” Megan said. “I want a hands-off rule on all my stuff. Including my bike.”
“Okay…”
“And I want everyone to stop calling me Megan C Cups behind my back.”
Doug’s jaw went slack as he flushed. “How did you know about that?”
Megan raised her eyebrows.
“All right, fine. Is that all?” Doug said.
“You think you can do these things for me?” Megan asked.
“Well, I may have to put the beatdown on a few people, but yeah. No problem,” Doug said casually.
“Don’t beat down anybody,” Megan said.
“Don’t tell me how to do my job,” Doug said, cracking his knuckles comically.
“Okay,” Megan said, standing. For the first time all day, she felt calm--certain. “I’ll come back.”
“Thank God!” Doug said. “Let’s get the hell outta this place.”
“Oh, wait! One more thing,” Megan said, stopping Doug in his tracks.
His shoulders slumped and he turned around. “What? You want my kidney?”
“I want in on the next ultimate Frisbee game,” Megan said.
Doug grinned. “You’re playin’ skins.”
Megan grinned back. “We’ll see about that.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Do you guys even realize that you’re not really playing ultimate?” Megan asked. “I looked it up online and you’re doing it entirely wrong.”
“We’re doing it McGowan style,” Doug replied with a knowing nod.
“What does that mean?” Megan asked.
“It’s football with a Frisbee,” Finn told her. “And at the end of the game we like to high five a lot and make barking noises. No one knows why or when we started it; we just did.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys



“Wow,” Finn said, looking her up and down. “Wander into a bad part of town?”
Megan looked down at the scrape on her left knee and the nasty bruise forming on her shin.
“No. It was…practice,” Megan said. “I’m sorry, should I go?”
“No! No,” Finn said, pulling a stool out from the wall. “Come in. Take a load off. You look like you could use it.”
Megan smiled and inched into the shed, afraid to touch anything with any part of her body. She slipped sideways past his easel and sat down on the stool, which shifted under her weight. Megan threw her arms out for balance and Finn caught her hand.
“Sorry. It’s kind of old,” he said.
“No problem,” Megan replied. She looked at his hand clamped around hers. He released her, clearing his throat and slapping his palm against his jeans.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“So, Hailey give you those?” Finn asked, lifting his chin and looking at her legs. He squirted some paint from a tube onto his palette and pressed his brush into it, mixing it around.
“How did you know?” Megan asked.
“I know Hailey,” Finn replied, blowing away a blond curl that fell in front of his eye. “At the Fourth of July party at the town pool in second grade, she stole my Popsicle and shoved me into the deep end. I’ve been afraid if her ever since.”
“Seriously?” Megan said with a smirk.
“I never joke about Popsicles,” Finn replied with a half smile.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“So, is she giving you hell?”
“Who?”
“Hailey,” Finn replied.
Megan smirked. “Nothing I can’t handle.”
Finn turned away from his painting to smile at her. “Good,” he said.
For some reason, that simple word flooded Megan with relief. Maybe it was the way he said it. Like he was proud of her. Or impressed. Or not at all surprised.
“Maybe I’ll even make her repay you your Popsicle,” Megan quipped.
“That’s okay. I’m over Popsicles,” Finn said. “I’m more of a milk shake man now.” He pulled up on his belt loops and they both laughed.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“It’s time to pack your gear, Kicker,” her father announced, forcing a boisterous grin. “We’re moving to South Korea!”
Yup. There it was. Megan went into free fall. Her internal organs turned weightless and started floating around inside her body cavity. She clutched the arms on the chair so tightly her knuckles turned white, just to keep from throwing up.
“What?” Megan blurted. Her voice sounded very far away.
“It’s been a while since we were transferred, hasn’t it?” her father said matter-of-factly. “This should be exciting.”
Exciting? Had he been testing gas masks over at the base today?”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Megan? Aren’t you going to say anything?” her mother asked.
Yeah, I’m gonna say something, Megan thought, standing up.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys



“My advice? Just be yourself. I’m sure you’ll be fine.”
Megan managed to smile and Regina slammed the car door. Be myself. Yeah. Right. Because that’s gotten me so far in the past.
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“This is it?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Megan replied.
“Wow. I thought girls were notorious for overpacking.”
“I’m not much of a girl,” Megan replied.
What? What did you just say?
He looked her up and down and smiled. “Could’ve fooled me.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


Megan Meade’s Guide to the McGowan Boys
Entry One

Observation #1: When they’re beautiful, they know they’re beautiful.
Like the second-to-oldest one, Evan. He’s a senior. He is perfection personified. And he knows it. You can tell because he just sort of smiles knowingly when you gape at him. Not that I’ve been gaping at him. Not at all. Anyway, too soon yet to tell if it negatively affects his behavior. (Like Mike Blukowsi and his Astrodome-sized ego problem.)

Observation #2: They like skin.
Especially skin they think they’re not necessarily supposed to be seeing. Like the space between your belly tee and your waistband.

Observation #3: They have no problem bringing up events that would mortify me into shamed silence if the roles were reversed.
Like Evan totally brought up the wiffleball bat incident, when if that had happened to me, I’d be wishing on every one of my birthday cakes for everyone to forget it.

Observation #4: They gossip.
Can you believe it? I overheard Finn and Doug in the backyard talking about some girl named Dawn who blew off some guy named Simon for some other guy named Rick for like TWENTY MINUTES! They sounded like those old mole-hair ladies at Sal’s Milkshakes. ‘Member the ones who lectured us for a whole hour that day about how young women shouldn’t wear shorts? Wait, okay, I got sidetracked.

Observation #5: The older ones are so cute with the younger ones.
They were playing ultimate Frisbee when I first got here and Evan totally let Caleb and Ian tackle him. It was soooooo cute. **sigh.**

Observation #6: They’re cliquey.
I mean, eye-rolling, secret-handshake, don’t-talk-to-us-unless-you’ve-got-an-X-and-a-Y cliquey. Very schooled in the art of the freeze-out.

Observation #7: They have no sense of personal space.
I need a lock on my door. STAT.

Observation #8: Boys are icky.
Do not even get me started on the state of the bathroom. I’m thinking of calling in a haz-mat team. Seriously.

Observation #9: They have really freaky things going on down there.
Yeah, I don’t think I’m ready to elaborate on that one yet.

Observation #10: They know how to make enemies.
Big time.

― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


“Nice one, Megan!” Coach Leonard called. “The rest of you are making me look bad! Let’s go!”
This time the other center forward glowered full force at Megan when they toed the line. “Beginner’s luck,” she said.
Megan ignored her, knowing she would formulate a comeback five hours from now--one she would never have the guts to deliver anyway. Instead, she’d just make this girl eat her dust.”
― quote from Megan Meade's Guide to the McGowan Boys


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