“When I die, I want them to bury me facedown and ass up so that the whole world can kiss my ass!”
“What if I have bad breath?' I asked.
'Chew on some gum,' she said.
'What if I can't find his tongue?'
'Back off on your tongue until you can feel his.'
'What if he throws up in my mouth?'
'Um, that would just be gross.”
“I'm probably the only person on earth who had to be committed to a mental hospital to find a date.”
“I hardly think it wise to put the idea of flying into the heads of impressionable teenagers who are already battling the challenges of lunacy.”
“Raisins again. I like raisins, but I have a habit of losing one or two on the floor every time I eat them. I always find them later and think they are: a) a mouse turd or b) a cockroach. Then I figure out it's a raisin and sigh with relief. This pretty much happens every time I find a lost raisin.”
“Get Well Soon. People sent me get well soon cards while I was in a mental hospital. There were fluffy little bunnies, floaty rainbows, and even a religious card. I could understand that Hallmark probably doesn’t make “Get Sane Soon” cards, but still. Was I not well before? Am I well now? Who decides?”
“So love is possible at the Loony Bin. Or, at least, lust.”
“It's amazing how something can be blue and yet absolutely colorless.”
“The heavens grant us only one life, but through books, we live a thousand." - Godsgrave by Jay Kristoff”
“I’m fated to lose everyone I ever love,” April said. “I already know that.” “Of course you are,” Jet responded in her calm, measured tone. “That’s what it means to be alive.”
“the killer question: “If I didn’t already own this, how much would I spend to buy it?”
“I’d always kept an eye on the house. I don’t mean doing repairs, for as the house didn’t belong to me that was not my place, but rather I’d keep watch over its decline. The changes come slowly, like watching a woman age: another line, the spread of crow’s feet, age spots rising slowly to the surface. One day the face you know is ravaged.”
“Right now I want a word that describes the feeling that you get--a cold sick feeling, deep down inside--when you know something is happening that will change you, and you don't want it to, but you can't stop it. And you know, for the first time, for the very first time, that there will now be a before and an after, a was and a will be. And that you will never again quite be the same person you were.”
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