Mark Goulston · 177 pages
Rating: (414 votes)
“Emotions are built on layers. Beneath hatred is usually anger; beneath anger is frustration; beneath frustration is hurt; beneath hurt is fear. If you keep expressing your feelings, you will generally move through them in that order. What begins with “I hate you” culminates in “I’m scared. I don’t want to lose you, and I don’t know what to do about it.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“You know the old saying, “If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.” Well, if you always get out as soon as the kitchen gets hot, your life will end up half-baked.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.” —ALEXANDER POPE”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.” —INDIRA GANDHI”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“Both partners describe one of their own character flaws. Humility resolves self-righteousness.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“Both partners share a quality of the other person that they admire. Admiration resolves disappointment. Both partners express appreciation for something that the other one did. Gratitude resolves resentment. Both partners apologize, without excuses, for something they did to hurt the other person. Remorse resolves hurt.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“All the beautiful sentiments in the world weigh less than a simple lonely action.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“But the goal is not to replace what cannot be replaced, or duplicate what cannot be duplicated, but simply to create opportunities for new memories. One”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you’ve understood all your life, but in a new way.” —DORIS LESSING Ordinary”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
“Those who are comfortable taking chances know that the best way to grow is to reach beyond their grasp. Their sense of direction comes from the heart. They don’t shy away from surprise; they might even seek it out. And they seldom die with regrets. In the end we regret not what we have done but what we have not done.”
― Mark Goulston, quote from Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
Mark Goulston
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“No one wanted to date a man who was only five feet three inches tall.”
― Leslie T. Chang, quote from Factory Girls: From Village to City in a Changing China
“we may face numerous problems seeming to contradict God’s plan, these shouldn’t be barriers but opportunities to turn a negative into a positive. It’s”
― Jamie Ayres, quote from 18 Things
“Romero hurled a few shotgun blasts into an opponent and yelled, “Eat that, fucker!” The sheepish guy on the other computer looked up in fear. Shawn knew that look—the look of gamer who had never heard true, unbridled smack-talk, just like he’d been the first time he had heard Romero insult him during a game. But now Shawn was a pro and joined right in. “Suck it down, monkey fuck!” he called, after firing a few blasts from his BFG. The gamers cowered. They would learn.”
― quote from Masters of Doom: How Two Guys Created an Empire and Transformed Pop Culture
“But at home, that same day he'd jumped into the fountain, he'd gotten so anxious, pacing around the living room listening to his parents try to calm him, that he suddenly just lost it completely and slapped his face. He immediately started crying, confused and guilty, looking up at his parents like he had no idea how it happened. And, really, that's the way it always was with the hitting. It would happen so fast, his body shaking to release the tension that built up from all the thoughts swirling through his mind and all the air he was having trouble breathing and all the loud beating of his own heart ringing in his ears. It had to get out and that was the path it chose. Slap. Instant relief.”
― John Corey Whaley, quote from Highly Illogical Behavior
“That wasn’t defense. That was fucking psychopath behavior. You were one step behind Hannibal Lecter with that shit.”
― A.R. Torre, quote from The Girl in 6E
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