Quotes from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“No one ever found out what was happening inside me. How the pain was eating me away. No one ever came to my rescue, or stood up for me.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I hear you. I just don't believe a word you say.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Everything seems to be working." Except me. I'm broken.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I've never been afraid of the dark. I'm more afraid of the day, of people. I love the night. The solitude. Well, I don't love it. I don't feel love. I hate people, so I hope when I get there it isn't crowded. I hope the light is a momentary phenomenon and the other side is completely black. And silent.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Stop trying to save me. You couldn't then; you can't now.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Never question the sanity of a woman who can render you defenseless with a look.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“What I know is you can't go back. You can't press delete and re-key your life.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“There's no reason to speak. I have nothing to say.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Don't choose me. I'm not worth your time.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I'm sorry you don't get it, Mom. Sometimes I don't get why I do the things I do. I just know I wake up every morning and wish I was dead.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“But you'd sell your soul for it, wouldn't you? For one day of feeling beautiful.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I may be fat and ugly, but I'm not stupid. If anyone had ever gotten past my looks, they might've noticed I have a brain.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I had to fight so hard not to cry.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Girls scare me more than boys. Boys are cruel. Girls are mean.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“What can happen in a few minutes changes you forever.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Why are people so cruel? What did I ever do to them?”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I hated him. I hated them all. They made me hate myself even more than I already did.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I wish I could tell my parents, " If you want to help me, help me die.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“There's always a way out. All you have to do is take it.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I never defended myself. Not once. I never said, "Excuse me? What gives you the right to insult and demean me?" I let them steal my dignity.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I have no intent. I have no reason to live, that's all. When I'm gone, I don't want to be remembered.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Your failures and your faults, they stick with you. They glob into ugly, cancerous growths inside you and make you want to die.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“His invitation lingers. So does my question. Why me? I don't know the answer. When I look at myself in the mirror, all I see is a starving, stunted bird who never grew wings and lost all reason to sing.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I don't sleep. All night long I'm wide awake, thinking, Secrets, secrets, secrets. There are secrets in my past no one needs to know. Secrets in my present that might kill Kim and Chip. I don't want to take my secrets with me when I go. When I pass through the light, i want to be free of everything and everyone.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I just want the pain to end.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“I'm scared. What will tomorrow bring? It has to be better than today. It has to.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“You won't know until it's over. You won't find me in time.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“She'll go to hell. They all will. If hell will even have them.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“The sad truth is, they should never trust me.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

“Who will see you through the darkness? "Me," I key in the answer. "I'll find my own way.”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead

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“How many of us are dead because of their potential unleashed? Your calorie masters showed us what happens. People die."

"Everyone dies." The doctor waves a dismissal. "But you die now because you cling to the past. We should all be windups by now. It's easier to build a person impervious to blister rust than to protect an earlier version of the human creature. A generation from now, we could be well-suited for our new environment. Your children could be the beneficiaries. Yet you people refuse to adapt. You cling to some idea of a humanity that evolved in concert with your environment over millennia, and which you now, perversely, refuse to remain in lockstep with.

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"I'm Buddhist."

"And we all know windups have no souls." Gibbons grins. "No rebirth for them. They will have to find their own gods to protect them. Their own gods to pray for their dead." His grin widens. "Perhaps I will be that one, and your windup children will pray to me for salvation." His eyes twinkle. "I would like a few more worshippers, I must admit. Jaidee was like you. Always such a doubter. Not as bad as Grahamites, but still, not particularly satisfactory for a god."

Kanya makes a face. "When you die, we will burn you to ash and bury you in chlorine and lye and no one will remember you."

The doctor shrugs, unconcerned. "All gods must suffer.”
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