Quotes from An Untamed State

Roxane Gay ·  368 pages

Rating: (13.6K votes)


“I am not easy to love but I am well loved. I try to love well in return.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“When he finished talking, I said, “Your mother did not deserve the unwanted attentions of a man like my father.” I said, “I did not deserve the unwanted attentions of a man like you. It is often women who pay the price for what men want.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“Once upon a time, my life was a fairy tale and then I was stolen from everything I’ve ever loved. There was no happily ever after. After days of dying, I was dead.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“because sometimes, to find home, you must first go farther afield.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“My mother has often told me there are some things you cannot tell a man who loves you, things he cannot handle knowing.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State



“It is an amazing thing,” my father once told me after Christophe was born, “how much a child loves a parent. That kind of love terrifies me.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“When I tried to push him away, he only held on to me more tightly. I have always appreciated how he never lets me go. I need that. My natural instinct is for flight and the safety of solitude.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“Kenbe fèm,” she said. Hold steady. Stay strong.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“She grabbed me and pulled me into a warm embrace. Just as quickly she pushed me away. She said, “Thank you for getting on my nerves for so long,” and I said, “You’re welcome, Lorraine.” We have talked three or four times a week ever since. She is family.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“My brother tried to sag his jeans until a stranger in the airport grabbed him by the ears and hitched his pants up to their proper place, sucking her teeth and shaking her head.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State



“People love a real tragedy when they think it cannot happen to them.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I looked plenty close, Mireille, and saw many beautiful things but I also saw terrible things. I can’t pretend otherwise. You shouldn’t expect me to.” “Right,”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“Mona is my best friend. Wherever she has gone, the whole of our lives, I have tried to follow. Michael and I moved to Miami because she was there. Wherever she is feels more like home.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“Girl children are not safe in a world where there are men. They need to learn to be strong. There”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I shouted, “This is not right,” knowing my words were useless. There’s no room for such distinctions in a country where too many people have to claw for what they need and still have nothing to hold. My”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State



“Until that moment, Michael had not understood the vastness of the world and how small a place he held in it,”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“my hands, my fingers quickly slicking with”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“What is truly terrifying is the exact knowledge of what will come and being unable to save yourself from it. Grabbing”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I wanted to tell him I saw the exact same things he did, that this country was a lot for anyone to take, but it was easier to pretend I didn’t. Back”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“How could I forget? We had a blast but we were surrounded by misery. That is hard to take. I’m just being honest.” “Michael,”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State



“I don’t understand women like you,” he said, winding down. “You could have made things easier for yourself. Would it be so hard to play nice with me?” “I don’t understand men like you. You could have made things easier for me.” “You”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“You people are all the same. You live in your grand homes looking down on us in the gutter. You think you control everything and can have anything.” “There”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I ran through these streets and thought, “This is a Haiti I have never seen or known.” It was a Haiti no one should have to know. I”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“People like you always choose to absolve yourselves. You are complicit even if you do not actively contribute to the problem because you do nothing to solve it.” I”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I stared at the woman who betrayed me. I shouted, “How could you? We are both daughters of Dessalines.” She stood perfectly still. She did not blink. She did not look away with her dry eyes. By”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State



“The mother kills one child to feed twelve, and one child to feed eleven, and one child to feed ten until she is left with but one child, whom she also slaughters because she too hungers. Finally, she returns to the middle of a cornfield where she slaughtered her other children, where the bones of their thirteen bodies lay. She slits her own throat because she cannot bear the burden of having done what needed to be done. After telling me this story, Elsa said, “A West Indian woman always faces such choices.” The”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“I made my choice. There is nothing you cannot do when you are no one.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“It is often women who pay the price for what men want.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


“And now, she knew her husband had lied to her. So many years, following him to so many places, and he had repaid her with such staggering deceit.”
― Roxane Gay, quote from An Untamed State


About the author

Popular quotes

“They say that God never closes a door without opening a window.
I hate that saying. Closing a door is an asshole move, and opening a window just means you can look at, but not take part in, whatever is on the other side. Or maybe the window is there so you can throw yourself out of it.
Either way, it's a shitty deal, and why wouldn't you just kick the door back open?”
― Andra Brynn, quote from Where I End and You Begin


“Through the trees there was a motion, a person walking on the road. Isabelle watched as the girl - it was Amy - moving slowly and with her head down, came up the gravel driveway. The sight of her pained Isabelle. It pained her terribly to see her, but why?
Because she looked unhappy, her shoulders slumped like that, her neck thrust forward, walking slowly, just about dragging her feet. This was Isabelle's daughter; this was Isabelle's fault. She hadn't done it right, being a mother, and this youthful desolation walking up the driveway was exactly proof of that. But then Amy straightened up, glancing toward the house with a wary squint, and she seemed transformed to Isabelle, suddenly a presence to be reckoned with. Her limbs were long and even, her breasts beneath her T-shirt seemed round and right, neither large or small, only part of some pleasing symmetry; her face looked intelligent and shrewd. Isabelle, sitting motionless in her chair, felt intimidated.
And angry. The anger arrived in one quick thrust. It was the sight of her daughter's body that angered her. It was not the girl's unpleasantness, or even the fact that she had been lying to Isabelle for so many months, nor did Isabelle hate Amy for taken up all the space in her life. She hated Amy because the girl had been enjoying the sexual pleasures of a man, while she herself had not.”
― Elizabeth Strout, quote from Amy and Isabelle


“Take the goods the gods provide you.”
― H. Rider Haggard, quote from Dawn


“There had to be a Plan B. Plan A sucked.”
― Dayna Lorentz, quote from No Easy Way Out


“There is nothing more difficult to outgrow than anxieties that have become useful to us, whether as explanations for a life that never quite finds its true force or direction, or as fuel for ambition, or as a kind of reflexive secular religion that, paradoxically, unites us with others in a shared sense of complete isolation: you feel at home in the world only by never feeling at home in the world.”
― Christian Wiman, quote from My Bright Abyss: Meditation of a Modern Believer


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