Twice Upon a Time

Whaaaaaat is going on?" May whispered out of the corner of her mouth. "I'm sort of comforted by the fact that I can't figure it out," Jack responded.

Listen, last time I talked to you three, you were all two oars short of having any oars, so I don't want to hear it.

Oh, so close!" she said, her smile getting wider. "But close only counts in horseshoes and dragon fire.

The ship itself was about as long as a football field, or some other really long thing, given that may honestly could never remember how long football fields were. A hundred yards? That was like three hundred feet, wasn't it? The boat did seem long, but she was over five feet tall herself, and that's be like sixty of her end to end. Only sixty? Or was that a lot of herselves? Stupid analogies. The boat was big, that should cover it.

Thousand years, billion dollars,” May said to the monkey. “You. PAY.

You are awake,” Phillip said from his side. “I feared you were permanently injured.” “The day’s still young,” Jack told him, his head

The others just stopped and stared at him. “Correct me if I be wrong, little man,” Bluebeard said, “but ye do be wishin’ to live, aye? And ye do know that the Fish King will gut ye like a trout if he gets ahold a’ye?” “Basically Bluebeard’s calling you stupid,” May translated helpfully.

You’re right, Phillip!” May said, slamming a hand down on the railing. “Let’s go jump in the ocean and try not to drown, just to annoy my grandmother!

JACK!” May yelled. “NOW! SWORD HIM! SWORD HIM IN HIS FACE!

See, I like to think the point of life is to be happy,” Jack said with a shrug. “Also maybe not almost dying every two minutes. But I can see how we’ll have to agree to disagree here.

Fakin’? No,” the captain said, giving her a careful stare. “But don’t be misunderestimatin’ Captain Bluebeard anytime soon, lassie. I don’t be who ye think I be!” “You be someone without a good grasp on yer grammar, is who I think ye be,” May pointed out.

He grinned. “Like when you’re right in the middle of the worst adventure imaginable, but for a minute, it’s just about sitting on a boat in the middle of the ocean with your friends, with no one trying to kill you in any kind of horrifying way. You have to appreciate these moments when they happen, ’cause obviously we don’t get many of them.