“That’s my darling little doggie. Bubbles by name, bubbles for brains. You’ve got to love him.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“When a bloke takes you out for a meal You’d think sex would be part of the deal Not a pat on the head And a cold lonely bed When he leaves without copping a feel”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Knut, this is Jude. Remember I told you about him? He writes poetry.” Knut looked my half-Japanese self up and down. “Haiku?” he guessed. “Gesundheit,” I muttered sourly.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“I frowned. “Are you sure about this? It’s a bit short.” “So? It’s poetry, not dick size.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“So come on, tell me all the dirt about your date. Did he tie you up with his black belt? Show off his mystic knowledge of Eastern sex practices? What?” I let my head slump into my hands. “He gave me a kiss and said good night.” “He didn’t! The bastard.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“A pirate once shouted ‘Avast! I’ve caught you, you seadog, at last! Best pull out your sword— I’m coming aboard! Drop your britches, and climb up me mast!”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“All right, here’s a limerick: A young martial artist called Dave Was fearless and handsome and brave He saved me from thugs When I nearly got mugged So now I’m forever Dave’s slave.” There was a short silence. I cringed. “Um, sorry. Came out a bit gay, that one.” Bugger, bugger, bugger.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Look, I really appreciate you bringing me here, but I think there’s something you ought to know about me.” David smiled. “If it’s that you’re gay—“ Oh, puh-leeze. “No—God, no. I mean, yes, obviously, I’m fruitier than a greengrocers’ convention, but no, that wasn’t what I was about to say.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“No, that’s just Saturdays.” The whisper came from an orange-belted ninja. Did that make him a ginja?”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Lead me!” I told him fervently. “Astray is, like, my favourite place ever.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“You’re a darling, Keisha. If you weren’t a girl, I’d marry you.” “If I wasn’t a girl, I’d run a bloody mile next time I saw you coming.” “But, sweetie, you’ve never actually seen me coming. Unless you’ve got a spy camera rigged up in my bedroom, of course.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“A young man, when sliced up by glass From a footballer’s tragic mis-pass Said, ‘Hey, there’s no harm Done; it’s only an arm. I’m just thankful it wasn’t my arse.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Keisha frowned. “Maybe he’s hoping for hidden depths?” “I haven’t even got hidden”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“I was worried I’d scared you off,” I said as I slid into the passenger seat. “Being too gay and all.” “No—I, er…” He hesitated, and I looked at him sharply. Well, slightly less bluntly, anyway. My head still hurt. “I don’t have a problem with you being gay, Jude. I’m…well, I’m into blokes myself.” “You are?” I may have squeaked a bit. “But you’re so…” Butch, I should have said. And manly, and muscular, and gorgeous, and I bet you’re hairy too in all the right places. What came out was, “Straight.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“We all walked down the street together, looking like a sort of pick-and-mix adopted family: dad, disabled mum, and two differently mixed-race kids. Madonna would have been so proud of us.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“I’ll learn all the katas and be the ninjing-est ninja that ever ninjed.” Bubbles whined, so I bent down to rub his silky little head. “Is it the c-word, Bubbs? Don’t you worry, we love the doggas as well as the katas.” David laughed.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Roll over," he said, his voice all rough. "Jude, I want to be inside you. Is that okay?"
I sort of whimpered. Then nodded vigorously, in case he couldn't speak whimper.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Sod it. If he laid a finger on my David, I’d just have to use my newfound martial arts mojo and kick him in the Knuts.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“I’m fruitier than a greengrocers’ convention,”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“No need to read anything into it.” “Yeah, right. ’Cept it’s your tightest jeans, the ones that’ll give you gangrene in your nuts if you’re not careful,”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“He gave me a kiss and said good night.” “He didn’t! The bastard.” “Yeah,” I muttered to the tabletop. “He said he’d had a nice time.” “I’ll sodding kill him. What went wrong, Judi-babe?”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Are you sure about this? It’s a bit short.” “So? It’s poetry, not dick size.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
“Oh my God, you’re right! Our third date. We should totally have sex now!” It wasn’t my fault the waiter was walking past just as I said it and dropped the plate he was carrying. David stopped trying and laughed out loud.”
― J.L. Merrow, quote from Slam!
J.L. Merrow
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“The process of putting Haarlem behind him resembled the changes a man goes through when he divorces. He takes a girl friend to forget his wife, but just doing that prolongs the connection with the wife. Possibly things will work out only with the next girl friend - although the third one has the best chance. Boundaries have to be continuously sealed off, but it's a hopeless job, fore everything touches everything else in this world. A beginning never disappears, not even with the ending.”
― Harry Mulisch, quote from The Assault
“And this—instead of happiness—would be only what the two of us deserved, after all.”
― Melanie Benjamin, quote from Alice I Have Been
“Thanks to my ridiculous, sometimes tragic, and always unsteady upbringing, I was given the gift of bone-crushing insecurity. One thing you’ll notice about people with mental problems is constant self-absorbation. I think that’s because it’s such a struggle just to be who they are, so they have a hard time getting past it.”
― Mark Oliver Everett, quote from Things The Grandchildren Should Know
“Both Heaven and Hell are retroactive, all of one's life will eventually be known to have been one or the other.”
― Sheldon Vanauken, quote from A Severe Mercy: A Story of Faith, Tragedy and Triumph
“The genius of the current caste system, and what most distinguishes it from its predecessors, is that it appears voluntary. People choose to commit crimes, and that's why they are locked up or locked out, we are told. This feature makes the politics of responsibility particularly tempting, as it appears the system can be avoided with good behavior. But herein lies the trap. All people make mistakes. All of us are sinners. All of us are criminals. All of us violate the law at some point in our lives. In fact, if the worst thing you have ever done is speed ten miles over the speed limit on the freeway, you have put yourself and others at more risk of harm than someone smoking marijuana in the privacy of his or her living room. Yet there are people in the United States serving life sentences for first-time drug offenses, something virtually unheard of anywhere else in the world.”
― Michelle Alexander, quote from The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness
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