Quotes from Drowning Instinct

Ilsa J. Bick ·  352 pages

Rating: (4K votes)


“This is a fairy tale with teeth and claws.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“They call it the drowning instinct. It's when drowning doesn't look like drowning. (pg. 241)”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“What's the point of not taking chances? I don't know if I could stand living my whole life afraid.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Everybody breaks sooner or later, Bob. Anyone can drown. Sometimes you see it. Most often, you
don’t because the body protects and the skin hides, so drowning doesn’t look like drowning and some
people scar so nicely. Take it from an expert.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“They call it the drowning instinct. It´s when drowning doesn´t look like drowning. In real life, if the water´s very cold, a person can´t help but gasp. It´s reflex. The thing is as soon as water hits your lungs, your throat closes off, even it the water´s warm. Your body´s trying to protect itself, and the reality is that a lot more people suffocate than truly drown. Regardless, to people on land, especially when you´re really close to the end, you don´t look like you´re in trouble. You don´t scream, but that´s because you can ´t, and you don´t wave your arms either or expend a lot of energy flailing. You´re just there. So people don´t notice that you´re drowning. That´s me. I think I´ve been drowning all this time and doing it so quietly, even I didn´t know it.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct



“She's got the kind of ethereal, unselfconscious beauty some young girls possess that breaks your heart. Or theirs.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“We all have our fictions, little lies we tell ourselves to keep going from one day to the next.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“So I need the story, Jenna. I need the truth.
Right, like the two are the same thing.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“We were like matching bookends, almost touching but with volumes between us and stories, so many stories.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“That´s the problem with the truth.
Sometimes the truth is ambiguous, or really bad cliche.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct



“There are those individuals who die for a cause, and we say they have made the ultimate sacrifice. We call them martyrs, and we never doubt their sincerity.
Yet many others search their entire lives for something—or someone—worth dying for and this is very different. These are the lonely and the desperate, fearful that their lives have no meaning. They yearn for the bullet, if only someone else will pull the trigger.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“The grief in her green eyes slips then hardens and, for an instant, Pendleton sees the woman she has become and has no right being, not at sixteen.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Because if you can just hold off the moment when you must confront reality, time stands still and you can keep pretending that life will continue as you´ve known it: that nothing-not even something as wonderful and as terrible as love-has broken your world beyond repair.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“When the heart sinks, people fall.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“For that matter, my heart is broken. So maybe they´ĺl give me his. It´s something to shoot for.
And maybe, in all that, Bob?
There is forgiveness...”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct



“...she said all writers were prima donnas, drunks, social misfits, pompous, or depressed. Brilliant, maybe, but completely crazy.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Not everyone wears their scars on their skin.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Honestly, Bob: how do you carve a scream?”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“You know, Bob, school is school, one of those life experiences we kids all have to get through in order to become you. Then we wonder what all the fuss was about, especially while we're cleaning up your little messes: toxic waste, war, bank bailouts. Honestly, if we ran up debt the way you guys do? You'd ground us, take away our cells, and make us clean toilets with a toothbrush until we'd pay back every penny.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“I think. I sense. I wonder.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct



“I´d never heard a man cry before, Bob, but...it´s awful. (...) I think some man aren´t used to it and don´t know what to do with all that feeling. Their emotions are hexane ignited in their chests and rips them apart, and then they feel like they´re going to die-just as something was dying, at that moment in Mitch.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Tell yourself you’re dead, the way Matt does, so the past can’t hurt you.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“It was, come to think of it, a little like a kinder, gentler Psycho-Dad making one of his command decisions. Exactly the same, only without all the fuss and blood.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Don't get so caught up in looking behind you forget to look ahead.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“So I think I’ll stay here a little while longer. There’s plenty of time to get off this gurney and open that door and rejoin the rest of you.
There’s all the time I have left on Earth.
There’s the rest of my life.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct



“...what's the point of not taking chances? I don't know if I could stand living my whole life afraid.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“What about study hall? Shouldn't I go to the library?
"What for, Ms. Lord?" Mr. anderson said. "You're with me”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


“Dewerman was this bearded 1960’s throwback: a Teletubby in tie-dye, suspenders, and thinning hair scraped back into a stringy gray rat.”
― Ilsa J. Bick, quote from Drowning Instinct


About the author

Ilsa J. Bick
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“I got back into my car and followed the trucks; at the end of the road, the Polizei unloaded the women and children, who rejoined the men arriving on foot. A number of Jews, as they walked, were singing religious songs; few tried to run away; the ones who did were soon stopped by the cordon or shot down. From the top, you could hear the gun bursts clearly, and the women especially were starting to panic. But there was nothing they could do. The condemned were divided into little groups and a noncom sitting at a table counted them; then our Askaris took them and led them over the brink of the ravine. After each volley, another group left, it went very quickly. I walked around the ravine by the west to join the other officers, who had taken up positions above the north slope. From there, the ravine stretched out in front of me: it must have been some fifty meters wide and maybe thirty meters deep, and went on for several kilometers; the little stream at the bottom ran into the Syrets, which gave its name to the neighborhood. Boards had been placed over this stream so the Jews and their shooters could cross easily; beyond, scattered pretty much everywhere on the bare sides of the ravine, the little white clusters were multiplying. The Ukrainian “packers” dragged their charges to these piles and forced them to lie down over them or next to them; the men from the firing squad then advanced and passed along the rows of people lying down almost naked, shooting each one with a submachine bullet in the neck; there were three firing squads in all. Between the executions some officers inspected the bodies and finished them off with a pistol. To one side, on a hill overlooking the scene, stood groups of officers from the SS and the Wehrmacht. Jeckeln was there with his entourage, flanked by Dr. Rasch; I also recognized some high-ranking officers of the Sixth Army. I saw Thomas, who noticed me but didn’t return my greeting. On the other side, the little groups tumbled down the flank of the ravine and joined the clusters of bodies that stretched farther and farther out. The cold was becoming biting, but some rum was being passed around, and I drank a little. Blobel emerged suddenly from a car on our side of the ravine, he must have driven around it; he was drinking from a little flask and shouting, complaining that things weren’t going fast enough. But the pace of the operations had been stepped up as much as possible. The shooters were relieved every hour, and those who weren’t shooting supplied them with rum and reloaded the clips. The officers weren’t talking much; some were trying to hide their distress. The Ortskommandantur had set up a field kitchen, and a military pastor was preparing some tea to warm up the Orpos and the members of the Sonderkommando. At lunchtime, the superior officers returned to the city, but the subalterns stayed to eat with the men. Since the executions had to continue without pause, the canteen had been set up farther down, in a hollow from which you couldn’t see the ravine. The Group was responsible for the food supplies; when the cases were broken open, the men, seeing rations of blood pudding, started raging and shouting violently. Häfner, who had just spent an hour administering deathshots, was yelling and throwing the open cans onto the ground: “What the hell is this shit?” Behind me, a Waffen-SS was noisily vomiting. I myself was livid, the sight of the pudding made my stomach turn. I went up to Hartl, the Group’s Verwaltungsführer, and asked him how he could have done that. But Hartl, standing there in his ridiculously wide riding breeches, remained indifferent. Then I shouted at him that it was a disgrace: “In this situation, we can do without such food!”
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