Quotes from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty

Jody Gehrman ·  255 pages

Rating: (2.7K votes)


“Sometimes, a girl just has to dive under the duvet and regroup.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty


“Sure, okay, I'll pick up some cat litter. Anything else?"

"Watch your back, G." Then she hung up.

Hero paused in her sobbing to look at me quizzically. "Why does your mom want cat litter? You guys don't even have a cat."

"She uses it for..." I searched my brain madly, but all I could come up with was "teaching."

"She uses cat litter to teach English?"

I nodded. "She's kind of unconventional in her methods."

Hero frowned. "But how does she use it?"

The girl was relentless when she fixated on something. "Um, when their papers are really bad, she gives them a little bag of cat litter. It's her way of telling them their writing is crap." I laughed. "She's kooky.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty


“Think of it as a life experience," I mumbled. "Isn't your dad always saying we need more of that?"

"I don't think prancing around PJ Jamieson's pool in our underwear is exactly what he had in mind.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty


“La-di-dah, just out for a little spin, don't mind me.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty


“Went home briefly to get my halter dress for Hero's party, and Mom was waiting for me at the kitchen table. Either she's psychic, or she totally reads my journal, because I haven't said a word about Ben, but somehow she knows something is up.

She was siting with a tray of peanut butter crackers, milk, and about twenty pamphlets on STDs she got from her friend Connie, a nurse at Kaiser. When she started showing me pictures of genital warts, I put my cracker down and said, 'Mom, is this really necessary?' She said, 'Honey, I just want you to understand the risks.'

'Yeah, thanks. Now I'm so traumatized I won't have sex until I'm a senior citizen.'

She smiled. 'Great. I guess I've done my job then. Do you want a sandwich.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty



“Come on Geena. Dude's slippery as hell. He could talk his way out of a blow job in the Oval Office.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty


About the author

Jody Gehrman
Born place: in Santa Rosa, CA, The United States
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Popular quotes

“Between them all the poor little Rabbit was made to feel himself very insignificant and commonplace, and the only person who was kind to him at all was the Skin Horse.

The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away, and he knew that they were only toys, and would never turn into anything else. For nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the Skin Horse understand all about it.

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"


"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

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"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.

But the Skin Horse only smiled.”
― quote from The Velveteen Rabbit


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― Toni Morrison, quote from Beloved


“And entertainment has nothing to do with reality. Entertainment is antithetical to reality.”
― Michael Crichton, quote from Jurassic Park


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― John Boyne, quote from The Boy in the Striped Pajamas


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