Jody Gehrman · 255 pages
Rating: (2.7K votes)
“Sometimes, a girl just has to dive under the duvet and regroup.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
“Sure, okay, I'll pick up some cat litter. Anything else?"
"Watch your back, G." Then she hung up.
Hero paused in her sobbing to look at me quizzically. "Why does your mom want cat litter? You guys don't even have a cat."
"She uses it for..." I searched my brain madly, but all I could come up with was "teaching."
"She uses cat litter to teach English?"
I nodded. "She's kind of unconventional in her methods."
Hero frowned. "But how does she use it?"
The girl was relentless when she fixated on something. "Um, when their papers are really bad, she gives them a little bag of cat litter. It's her way of telling them their writing is crap." I laughed. "She's kooky.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
“Think of it as a life experience," I mumbled. "Isn't your dad always saying we need more of that?"
"I don't think prancing around PJ Jamieson's pool in our underwear is exactly what he had in mind.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
“La-di-dah, just out for a little spin, don't mind me.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
“Went home briefly to get my halter dress for Hero's party, and Mom was waiting for me at the kitchen table. Either she's psychic, or she totally reads my journal, because I haven't said a word about Ben, but somehow she knows something is up.
She was siting with a tray of peanut butter crackers, milk, and about twenty pamphlets on STDs she got from her friend Connie, a nurse at Kaiser. When she started showing me pictures of genital warts, I put my cracker down and said, 'Mom, is this really necessary?' She said, 'Honey, I just want you to understand the risks.'
'Yeah, thanks. Now I'm so traumatized I won't have sex until I'm a senior citizen.'
She smiled. 'Great. I guess I've done my job then. Do you want a sandwich.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
“Come on Geena. Dude's slippery as hell. He could talk his way out of a blow job in the Oval Office.”
― Jody Gehrman, quote from Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty
Jody Gehrman
Born place: in Santa Rosa, CA, The United States
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“The leech's kiss, the squid's embrace,
The prurient ape's defiling touch:
And do you like the human race?
No, not much.”
― Aldous Huxley, quote from Ape and Essence
“My glorious queen, I told you we’d have a beautiful life, you and I.”
― Kristen Ashley, quote from With Everything I Am
“I wish that you will find love. It is the only thing in life that makes the pain of being alive bearable.”
― Lucinda Riley, quote from The Seven Sisters
“Another example of how a metaphor can create new meaning for us came about by accident. An Iranian student, shortly after his arrival in Berkeley, took a seminar on metaphor from one of us. Among the wondrous things that he found in Berkeley was an expression that he heard over and over and understood as a beautifully sane metaphor. The expression was “the solution of my problems”—which he took to be a large volume of liquid, bubbling and smoking, containing all of your problems, either dissolved or in the form of precipitates, with catalysts constantly dissolving some problems (for the time being) and precipitating out others. He was terribly disillusioned to find that the residents of Berkeley had no such chemical metaphor in mind. And well he might be, for the chemical metaphor is both beautiful and insightful. It gives us a view of problems as things that never disappear utterly and that cannot be solved once and for all. All of your problems are always present, only they may be dissolved and in solution, or they may be in solid form. The best you can hope for is to find a catalyst that will make one problem dissolve without making another one precipitate out. And since you do not have complete control over what goes into the solution, you are constantly finding old and new problems precipitating out and present problems dissolving, partly because of your efforts and partly despite anything you do. The CHEMICAL metaphor gives us a new view of human problems. It is appropriate to the experience of finding that problems which we once thought were “solved” turn up again and again. The CHEMICAL metaphor says that problems are not the kind of things that can be made to disappear forever. To treat them as things that can be “solved” once and for all is pointless. To live by the CHEMICAL metaphor would be to accept it as a fact that no problem ever disappears forever. Rather than direct your energies toward solving your problems once and for all, you would direct your energies toward finding out what catalysts will dissolve your most pressing problems for the longest time without precipitating out worse ones. The reappearance of a problem is viewed as a natural occurrence rather than a failure on your part to find “the right way to solve it.” To live by the CHEMICAL metaphor would mean that your problems have a different kind of reality for you. A temporary solution would be an accomplishment rather than a failure. Problems would be part of the natural order of things rather than disorders to be “cured.” The way you would understand your everyday life and the way you would act in it would be different if you lived by the CHEMCAL metaphor. We see this as a clear case of the power of metaphor to create a reality rather than simply to give us a way of conceptualizing a preexisting reality.”
― George Lakoff, quote from Metaphors We Live By
“[Arguments about God are] like pointing a flashlight toward the sky to see if the sun is shining.”
― N.T. Wright, quote from Simply Christian: Why Christianity Makes Sense
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