“I like storms. Thunder torrential rain, puddles, wet shoes. When the clouds roll in, I get filled with this giddy expectation. Everything is more beautiful in the rain. Don't ask me why. But it’s like this whole other realm of opportunity. I used to feel like a superhero, riding my bike over the dangerously slick roads, or maybe an Olympic athlete enduring rough trials to make it to the finish line. On sunny days, as a girl, I could still wake up to that thrilled feeling. You made me giddy with expectation, just like a symphonic rainstorm. You were a tempest in the sun, the thunder in a boring, cloudless sky. I remember I’d shovel in my breakfast as fast as I could, so I could go knock on your door. We’d play all day, only coming back for food and sleep. We played hide and seek, you’d push me on the swing, or we’d climb trees. Being your sidekick gave me a sense of home again. You see, when I was ten, my mom died. She had cancer, and I lost her before I really knew her. My world felt so insecure, and I was scared. You were the person that turned things right again. With you, I became courageous and free. It was like the part of me that died with my mom came back when I met you, and I didn’t hurt if I knew I had you. Then one day, out of the blue, I lost you, too. The hurt returned, and I felt sick when I saw you hating me. My rainstorm was gone, and you became cruel. There was no explanation. You were just gone. And my heart was ripped open. I missed you. I missed my mom. What was worse than losing you, was when you started to hurt me. Your words and actions made me hate coming to school. They made me uncomfortable in my own home. Everything still hurts, but I know none of it is my fault. There are a lot of words that I could use to describe you, but the only one that includes sad, angry, miserable, and pitiful is “coward.” I a year, I’ll be gone, and you’ll be nothing but some washout whose height of existence was in high school. You were my tempest, my thunder cloud, my tree in the downpour. I loved all those things, and I loved you. But now? You’re a fucking drought. I thought that all the assholes drove German cars, but it turns out that pricks in Mustangs can still leave scars.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Yesterday lasts forever.
Tomorrow comes never.
Until you”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“You've already made me cry countless times." I raised my middle finger to him slowly, and asked, "Do you know what this is?" I took my middle finger and patted the corner of my eye with it. "It's me, wiping away the last tear you'll ever get.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“You were my tempest, my thunder cloud, my tree in the downpour. I loved all those things, and I loved you. But now? You’re a fucking drought. I thought that all the assholes drove German cars, but it turns out that pricks in Mustangs can still leave scars.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Are you mine?” I asked as I wiped my tears.
He kissed the corners of my mouth softly, and I felt heat rise up my neck. “Always have been,”
he whispered against my mouth.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Acting like you don't care is not letting it go.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Tate, you’re mine, and I’m yours. Every day you’re
going to realize that more and more. When you believe it without a doubt, then I’ll have earned your
trust.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I want to touch you.” His words were against my lips now. “I want to feel what’s mine. What’s always been mine.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“We never lost that. As much as I tried, I
could never erase you from my heart. That’s why I was such an asshole and kept guys away from you.
You were always mine.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Letting yourself be vulnerable isn't always a weakness. Sometimes it can be a conscious decision to draw the other person out.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“He smiled to himself. “Because she made you.” And he wrapped his skinny arm around my neck and yanked me into his side. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, and I wanted to tell her ‘thank you.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Isn’t it about time you fought back?”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I held Madoc by the inside of his elbow and held Jerod closer to me by the bicep. While a month ago I never would've thought I'd be with these two, I felt at ease. "Totally. This is the start of a great friendship." I jostled Madoc's arm playfully.
"It could be the start of a great porno, too," Madoc deadpanned, breaking into laughter.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“If I ever lay my hands on you,” he said low and husky, “You’ll want it.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Jared gripped me tighter. "If you beat metal long enough, it turns to steel.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“This is how bullies are made. I’d just purposely made him feel unloved and unwanted. I’d told him he was alone. Even with everything he’d pulled on me, I’d never felt abandoned or isolated. There was always someone that loved me, someone I could count on.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“If you beat metal long enough, it turns to steel.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I didn’t want Ben. Plain and simple. I wasn’t going to be one of those silly girls in a love triangle romance novel who couldn’t choose. Not that I was in a love triangle, but I never understood how a girl can’t know whether or not she wants a guy. We can be confused about what is good for us but not about what we truly want.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“He put a hand to my face and guided my eyes to his. "We never lost that. As much as I tried, I could never erase you from my heart. That's why I was such an asshole and kept guys away from you. You were always mine."
"Are you mine?" I asked as I wiped my tears.
He kissed the corners of my mouth softly, and I felt the heat rise up my neck. "Always have been," he whispered against my mouth.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“This is how bullies are made.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I thought that all the assholes drove German cars, but it turns out that pricks in Mustangs can still leave scars.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I was going to Homecoming with the one person in this school who made my skin crawl, I was getting attention from a gorgeous, star football player that I could care less about, and I was having wet dreams about a potential sociopath who acted like he hated me most of the time.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I know I can make this up to you. Don’t hate me.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“Being a bitch could be a survival technique. They get respect. There was no honor in people thinking you were a slut.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“What was worse than losing you was when you started to hurt me. Your words and actions made me hate coming to school. They made me uncomfortable in my own home.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“There was a time when I had all of his attention and loved it. As much as I wanted him to leave me alone, I also liked how he seemed surprised. I liked the way he was looking at me right now. And then I remembered that I hated him.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“He was giving me the same look I got Wednesday night right before he kissed me, and I knew I hadn’t imagined anything. It was anger and desire mixed together to make something hot enough for my knees to go weak.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“You were the person that turned things right again. With you, I became courageous and free. It was like the part of me that died with my mom came back when I met you, and I didn’t hurt if I knew I had you. Then one day, out of the blue, I lost you, too. The hurt returned, and I felt sick when I saw you hating me. My rainstorm was gone, and you became cruel. There was no explanation. You were just gone. And my heart was ripped open. I missed you.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
“There were so many times when we were kids, growing up next door to each other, that I thought Jared was the greatest. He was sweet, generous, and friendly. And the most beautiful boy I’d ever seen.”
― Penelope Douglas, quote from Bully
Penelope Douglas
Born place: in Dubuque, Iowa, The United States
Born date February 1, 2018
See more on GoodReads
“Truth! Truth! Truth! crieth the Lord of the Abyss of Hallucinations”
― Aleister Crowley, quote from The Book of Lies
“Gratitude is the only appropriate response to everything that happens.”
― Michael Cunningham, quote from Specimen Days
“It's like a big circle. I've gone on a get-a-man crusade, but so far it's been a disaster and I'm feeling as bad about myself as I ever have. I know I'm a great person and all that, a good friend, but I feel like real bottom of the barrel girlfriend material.”
― Ann Patchett, quote from Truth and Beauty
“That woman needs protecting like Rambo needs a bodyguard.”
― Jennifer Crusie, quote from Manhunting
“I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as the starfish loves a coral reef and as kudzu loves trees, even if the oceans turn to sawdust and the trees fall in the forest without anyone around to hear them. I will love you as the pesto loves the fettuccini and ats the horseradish loves the miyagi, and the pepperoni loves the pizza. I will love you as the manatee loves the head of lettuce and as the dark spot loves the leopard, as the leech loves the ankle of a wader and as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you as the doctor loves his sickest patient and a lake loves its thirstiest swimmer. I will love you as the beard loves the chin, and the crumbs love the beard, and the damp napkin loves the crumbs, and the precious document loves the dampness of the napkin, and the squinting eye of the reader loves the smudged document, and the tears of sadness love the squinting eye as it misreads what is written.
I will love you as the iceberg loves the ship, and the passengers love the lifeboat, and the lifeboat loves the teeth of the sperm whale, and the sperm whale loves the flavor of naval uniforms. I will love you as a drawer loves a secret compartment, and as a secret compartment loves a secret, and as a secret loves to make a person gasp... I will love you until all such compartments are discovered and opened, and all the secrets have gone gasping into the world. I will love you until all the codes and hearts have been broken and until every anagram and egg has been unscrambled. I will love you until every fire is extinguished and rebuilt from the handsomest and most susceptible of woods. I will love you until the bird hates a nest and the worm hates an apple. I will love you as we find ourselves farther and farther from one another, where once we were so close... I will love you until your face is fogged by distant memory. I will love you no matter where you go and who you see, I will love you if you don't marry me. I will love you if you marry someone else--and i will love you if you never marry at all, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all. That is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way.”
― Lemony Snicket, quote from The Beatrice Letters
Darkest Highlander
The Origins of Total...
The Red Queen
House of Pleasure
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