Elizabeth Scott · 276 pages
Rating: (7.5K votes)
“The truth is, I feel beyond sad. I feel empty. Numb. ”
“The thing is, that world doesn't exist. All growing up means is that your realize no one will come along to fix things. No one will come along to save you.”
“Why do people think being with someone is the answer to everything?”
“Wherever I go, I'll always see you. You'll always be with me. And there's no happy ending coming here, no way a story that started on a night that's burned into my heart will end the way I wish it could. You're really gone, no last words, and no matter how many letters I write to you, you're never going to reply. You're never going to say good-bye. So I will. Good-bye, Julia. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being you.”
“I deserved the shaking and the headaches and the fact that every single time I took a breath I felt a squeezing in my chest, my heart beating even though I wished it wasn't.”
“You can't go back to how things were. How you thought they were. All you really have... is now”
“I suppose he's making a real fashion statement, but this is high school. You're not supposed to be real. You're supposed to be enough like everyone else to get through and out into the waiting world.”
“But the past couple
of days I’ve missed you so much it’s felt like missing you
is all I am.”
“I always wanted to be grown up. When I was little I couldn’t wait to be a teenager and go to high school. When I got there I wanted to be done with it, wanted to get out into the world, the real one, and live in it. The thing is, that world doesn’t exist. All growing up means is that you realize no one will come along to fix things. No one will come along to save you.”
“I knew I was having a panic attack. I hadn't had one in a while, though, and I'd forgotton how they made everything like it- and I- was going to fall apart. How they reminded me of how trapped I was.”
“It's bullshit. It's so easy to label people, to look at a list of symptoms and say, "This is who you are. This is what you are.”
“You're right . . . you can't go back. No matter how much you want to, you never can”
“All growing up means is that you realize no one will come along and fix things.”
“ I never went for the
talkers.”
“I lied to Julia, I didn't know what else to do because you - you make me feel..." I had to stop. Not because I didn't have words. I did. But I was afraid to say them.
He looked at me, and I knew then I could love him. That if I let myself I would.
"You make me feel too," he said, and held out one hand.”
“My father looked like he was having a stroke— not
that Mel seemed to notice because he just kept talking.
“Patrick needs a ride. No car, you know, and so I figured,
hey, I can pick up some gas money.” He laughed. No one
else did, and now Patrick looked like he was trying to
push himself inside the door and hide.”
“Too late, too late, juice pouring does not a kind soul make, and I killed you.”
“I've missed you so much it's felt like missing you is all I am.
Like if someone looked inside me, there wouldn't be a skeleton and muscles and blood and nerves. There'd just be memories of you and all the things I've tried to say and ripped out of this notebook, all the things I want to say but can't because I don't have the words.”
“She did the "we have mysterious hand gestures that make us giggle" thing.”
“He kept talking and I thought about taking my copy of Huckleberry Finn and stuffing it in his mouth so he'd shut up.”
“Everyone gets scared," like it's some big profound statement?”
“Left alone, I must quickly have drifted off into my own thoughts, for I did not notice the barman return. He must have done so, however, for I was soon drinking coffee, staring at the mirrored wall behind the bar - in which I could see not only my own reflection but much of the room behind me. After a while, for some reason, i found myself replaying in my head key moments from a football match I had attended many years earlier - an encounter between Germany and Holland. I adjusted my posture on the high-stool - I could see I was hunching excessively - and tried recalling the names of the players in the Dutch team that year. Rep, Krol, Haan, Neeskens. After several minutes I had succeeded in remembering all but two of the players, but these last two names remained just beyond the rim of my recall. As I tried to remember, the sound of the fountain behind me, which at first I had found quite soothing, began to annoy me. It seemed that if only it woulds stop, my memory would unlock and I would finally remember the names.”
“Secrets have a way of making themselves felt, even before you know there's a secret.”
“I know what "nothing" means, and keep on playing.”
“În casa aceasta ,zeița noastră a orezului este bunica ta!Ea este păstrătoarea visurilor !Uită-te cu atenție și ai s-o vezi cum stă pe tronul ei de lemn ,ținându-ne toate speranțele si visurile ,mari și mici,ale tale și ale mele ,în brațele ei puternice .Anii nu-i scad puterea !”
“I will torture you for a human eternity, during which time you will beg me for death by an Opus 24/24, or an ax, or a thousand snakebites. I can see the future, Daniel, and I am looking forward to it, every excruciating second of your murder and dismembedment. Isn't that a wonderful English word, dis-member-ment?”
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