I'll Be Your Drill, Soldier

It would figure the best looking guy on this ward is gay...and he has a sexier than sin boyfriend...I swear to God I'm going to turn into a man. It's the only way".

Now wait a second..." Kenneth butted in. "Yeah, we haven't asked you the questions yet," Brandon finished for Kenneth. "Yeah, like what are your intentions toward our little Ryan," Patrick added, smirking. "What do you do for a living?" Brandon added. "Can you support Ryan's shoe fetish?" Kenneth threw his question in too. "Hmm, okay, here are my answers. I plan on feeding him, dancing with him and God willing fucking him until he can't walk straight. I help infertile chickens have baby chickens, and I think so. I'm hoping his feet are about my size. We can share shoes and everything," Phillip answered.

I tried to whisper sweet nothings into your ear but you're way the fuck over there and I'm way the fuck over here.

Just remember, Sergeant Grabowski. You may be able to order me around, but we both know who makes your privates stand at attention.

Now, to get this gift you have to stay sharp. Keep your head down. Don't be a hero unless you have to. All you have to do is survive. I know you can.