Quotes from If I Die

“You just say the word, and I'll make the rest of the world go away. I'll take you someplace safe, where no one else can reach us.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Only two years dead, and it was getting harder for me to feel…anything. I was starting to slip into the darkness. The numbness. And the worst part is that it wasn’t even scary. I was losing myself, and I didn’t even care. Then I met you, and at first I didn’t understand what had happened. What had changed. All I knew was that I wanted to be near you. Then you helped me with Addison, even though it nearly got you killed—I nearly got you killed—and I started to understand how special you are. But by then, you were getting serious with Nash. With my brother—one of few people in the whole world I still gave a damn about. So I tried to stay away. I tried so hard.” His voice cracked on the last word, and my heart cracked with it. Tears stood in my eyes, but I was afraid to let them fall. I was afraid to even breathe for fear of missing a single word. "But you kept pulling me back. You’re the brightest thing I’ve ever seen, Kaylee. You’re this beautiful ball of fire spitting sparks out at the world, burning fiercely, holding back the dark by sheer will. And I always knew that if I reached out—if I tried to touch you—I’d get burned. Because you’re not mine. I’m not supposed to feel the fire. I’m not supposed to want it. But I do. I want you, Kaylee, like I’ve never wanted anything. Ever. I want the fire. I want the heat, and the light, and I want the burn.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I could have kissed you months ago, but it wouldn’t have meant anything. I wished for you to see me. And want me. So…did you mean it?”
“Yes,” I said, and some unnamed tension inside me eased. “I see you, Tod.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“How long can you keep me invisible?"
"As long as were in physical contact."
My throat felt dry. "Holding hands?" That's how we'd done it last time.
"Unless you had something else in mind?”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“That's because Tod never brings anything but death and bad advice," I snapped.
"That's not true." Tod tried to grin, "Sometimes I bring pizza.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“There's a good kind of crazy, Kaylee," he insisted softly, reaching out to wrap his warm hand around mine. "It's the kind that makes you think about things that make your head hurt, because not thinking about them is the coward's way out. The kind that makes you touch people who bruise your soul, just because they need to be touched. This is the kind of crazy that lets you stare out into the darkness and rage at eternity, while it stares back at you, ready to swallow you whole."

Tod leaned closer, staring into my eyes so intently I was sure he could see everything I was thinking, but too afraid to say. "I've seen you fight, Kaylee. I've seen you step into that darkness for someone else, then claw your way out, bruised, but still standing. You're that kind of crazy, and I live in that darkness. Together, we'd take crazy to a whole new level.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“You think I need to be rescued?"
"I think it doesn't hurt to let someone else do the rescuing every now and then, when your own armor starts to get banged up.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“You know, most girls sleep with a teddy bear or an extra pillow. But I gotta say, that's kinda hot...”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“He shrugged, looking right into my eyes. "Right now, this is all I feel." He held our intertwined hands up for me to see and I wanted to look away, but I couldn't break the hold his gaze had on me, like he could see more than anyone else saw. Things I couldn't see myself.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Eastlake High makes Buffy's hellmouth look like a crack in the sidewalk.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“So ... will you stay with me until it's over? Please?"
"Kaylee, I would do anything for the girl who granted my dying wish.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“As a matter of fact, I was going to offer you something.”
“What did you have in mind?”
"A field trip. You interested in doing something dangerous, and possibly illegal?”
“Does it involve underage girls, broken curfews and assorted fruit toppings?”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I'm dead, not impotent. Nasty rumors like that must be squashed before they gain momentum. Feel free to emphasize how very functional I am.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“You're the brightest thing I've ever seen, Kaylee. You're this beautiful ball of fire spitting sparks out at the world, burning fiercely, holding back the dark by sheer will. And I always knew that if I reached out -- if i tried to touch you -- I'd get burned. Because you're not mine. I'm not supposed to feel the fire. I'm not supposed to want it. But I do. I want you, Kaylee, like I've never wanted anything. Ever. I want the fire. I want the heat, and the light, and I want the burn.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Tod's pale brows arched halfway up his forehead, and he looked suddenly, achingly wistful. "She knows not what she says..."

Maybe not. But I was starting to get a pretty good idea...”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“There’s an us?”
“As far as I’m concerned…” He leaned forward, his mouth inches from mine, and my pulse spiked. “There’s nothing but us.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I wanted more firsts with Tod. But all I had left was a handful of lasts.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“You should be careful, tossing descriptors like that around in a situation like this. My ‘problem’ isn’t little. Unless you’re drawing some pretty wild comparisons. Please tell me you’re not drawing wild comparisons. Or blood-relative comparisons.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“My pulse whooshed in my ears so fast I could barely hear myself speak. “I only have—”
“Two days.” He squeezed my hand. “So what? You can spend them feeling sorry for yourself, or you can let me help make them the best two days
of your life, and my afterlife. So what’s it gonna be?”
I stared into his eyes, like I’d never seen him before. And I hadn’t—not like this. But he’d obviously seen me, better than anyone else ever had.
“Well?” Tod watched me, his hand still warm in mine.
In answer, I leaned forward and kissed him again.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Did we ever find out for sure about the possible forked penis?”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Together, we'd take crazy to a whole new level.
~Tod”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“You shouldn't talk about things you don't understand. Which should leave you pretty damn quiet.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I should have mixed something stronger than Coke floats.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I fell into that kiss like Alice into Wonderland, headfirst and flailing, heart pounding the whole time. The world spun around me and still I fell, and I only crashed down to earth again when someone called my name.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Because you don't belong with him! I tried to tell you that, but you wouldn't listen, and I thought if you understood that he'd be better off without you, you'd break up with him for his own good. So I...exaggerated how easy it'd be for him to get over you, with Sabine there to step in. But I underestimated how incredibly stubborn you are"
"I prefer to think of it as dedication..." I mumbled.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Leave the door open," my dad said, the second most common warning in his arsenal. Right behind, "Nash, go home.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“Maybe I won't look so bad when you're not standing next to me.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“There’s a good kind of crazy, Kaylee,” he insisted softly, reaching out to wrap his warm hand around mine. “It’s the kind that makes you think
about things that make your head hurt, because not thinking about them is the coward’s way out. The kind that makes you touch people who bruise your
soul, just because they need to be touched. This is the kind of crazy that lets you stare out into the darkness and rage at eternity, while it stares back at
you, ready to swallow you whole.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

“I want you, Kaylee, like I’ve never wanted anything. Ever. I want the fire. I want the heat, and the light, and I want the burn.”
― Rachel Vincent, quote from If I Die

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