Bill Watterson · 175 pages
Rating: (16.3K votes)
“Calvin: I used to hate writing assignments, but now I enjoy them. I realized that the purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure poor reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog! Want to see my book report?
Hobbes: (Reading Calvin's paper) "The Dynamics of Interbeing and Monological Imperatives in Dick and Jane: A Study in Psychic Transrelational Gender modes."
Calvin: Academia, here I come!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“From now on, I'm not doing anything I don't want to do! The world owes me happiness, fulfillment and success.... I'm just here to cash in.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“You can present the material, but you can't make me care.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“You never know when some crazed rodent with cold feet could be running loose in your pants.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“If you do the job badly enough, sometimes you don't get asked to do it again.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Like delicate lace,
So the threads intertwine,
Oh, gossamer web
Of wond'rous design!
Such beauty and grace
Wild nature produces...
Ughh, look at the spider
Suck out that bug's juices!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“You know, maybe we don't need enemies."
"Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“It's a funny world, Hobbes."
"True."
"But it's not a hilarious world.…unless you like sick humour."
"The world is probably funnier to people who don't live here.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Don't look into car headlights and freeze, because you'll either get run over or shot!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“This tiger is sprawled
So still and so flat,
A question arises
When glancing thereat.
Is he asleep? to be
Perfectly frank,
He looks more as if
He was creamed by a tank!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“S...For Stupendous!
T...For Tiger, ferocity of!
U...For Underwear, Red!
P...For Power, Incredible!
E...For excellent physique!
N...For...Um...Something..Hm, well, I'll come back to that...
D...For Determination!
U...For...Wait, How do you spell this? Is it "I"??”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Idiocy is the essence of the male mind.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Oh lovely snowball, packed with care, smack a head that's unaware! Then with freezing ice to spare, melt and soak through underwear! Fly straight and true, hit hard and square! This, oh snowball, is my prayer. I only throw consecrated snowballs.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“My book is called, "Shut Up And Stop Whining: How To Do Something With Your Life Besides Think About Yourself.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food and beer conglomerates. Who'd have ever guessed product consumption, popular entertainment and spirituality would mix so harmoniously. It's a beautiful world, all right.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Maybe we can eventually make language a complete impediment to understanding.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
“Today for show & tell, I've brought in some flash cards I made. Each card has a letter followed by several dashes. When I show the card, you yell out the vulgar, obscene or blasphemous word they stand for! …Ready? …She's such a hypocrite about building vocabulary.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat
Bill Watterson
Born place: in Washington, D.C., The United States
Born date July 5, 1958
See more on GoodReads
“where on earth can I go to save my son from such suffering? Is there any corner of the vast world where people live without tormenting each other?”
― Ayşe Kulin, quote from Last Train to Istanbul
“The 'bad guys' are the ones who are often misunderstood”
― Matt Myklusch, quote from Jack Blank and the Imagine Nation
“We are born with impulses that draw us to others and that later in life make us care about them.”
― Frans de Waal, quote from Our Inner Ape: A Leading Primatologist Explains Why We are Who We Are
“In the beginning, it takes focus, effort, and more energy in your brain, but after you make the swing or say hello enough times, it becomes effortless. Thus, to rewire your brain you’ll have to stay with the new behavior long enough to make it become fairly automatic. In time, practice will make it effortless. Your brain won’t have to work as hard once you reach this level.”
― quote from Rewire Your Brain: Think Your Way to a Better Life
“What are you lying about now, devil,” she rasped, coughing when the blood filled up her throat again. Dark fury flashed in his eyes and iron fingers dug into her jaw. She screamed and writhed, fighting to escape the point of metal filling her vision. She screamed as he pressed it into her eye, drilling through her eyeball. She clenched her fists and jolted under the straps, her body going into spams of agony. “How”
― Lucian Bane, quote from Desecrating Solomon 3
The Red Badge of Cou...
Kushiel's Dart
Cross My Heart and H...
Year of Wonders
Animal Farm / 1984
The Complete Persepo...BookQuoters is a community of passionate readers who enjoy sharing the most meaningful, memorable and interesting quotes from great books. As the world communicates more and more via texts, memes and sound bytes, short but profound quotes from books have become more relevant and important. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author’s best ideas.
We thoughtfully gather quotes from our favorite books, both classic and current, and choose the ones that are most thought-provoking. Each quote represents a book that is interesting, well written and has potential to enhance the reader’s life. We also accept submissions from our visitors and will select the quotes we feel are most appealing to the BookQuoters community.
Founded in 2023, BookQuoters has quickly become a large and vibrant community of people who share an affinity for books. Books are seen by some as a throwback to a previous world; conversely, gleaning the main ideas of a book via a quote or a quick summary is typical of the Information Age but is a habit disdained by some diehard readers. We feel that we have the best of both worlds at BookQuoters; we read books cover-to-cover but offer you some of the highlights. We hope you’ll join us.
