“You told me once dear, you really loved me
And no one else could come between.
But now you've left me and love another;
You have shattered all my dreams.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“This is my first real memory of James. In every memory before that, he’s just a flash of color, a warm body with a blurred face, a comforting voice begging me not to die. When he planted himself between our father and me that day, an eight-year-old with small fists clenched at his sides, I think I fell in love with my brother.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“James is why I never left. I should have left.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“He stabs his fingers through his drying hair and resumes his pacing. “You think I don’t know this went really fast? I didn’t plan for this to happen. Hell, I didn’t even know if you’d let me talk to you, much less be with you. But then you did and we did and…” He stops in the center of the room and stares at me, his shoulders sagging. “I figured out pretty quick that this is a forever thing for me. I think it has been from the very beginning.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“Two babies in little more than a year and a half. Knockout Jimmy was forced to give up boxing and take a job in the paper mill.
It broke him, and in turn, he broke us all.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“I want to heal my brother, kiss his cuts and bruises and lips, and save from what's happening in my heart.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“James “Knockout Jimmy” O’Brien, Granite Fall’s very own boxing legend—a title he held until a young groupie poked holes in the condom she made him wear “for protection.”
My brother was born nine months later, fists already swinging.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“Selfish as this sounds, I meant what I said earlier,” he finally says.
I try to remember what he said, but everything is kind of a blur. “Which part?”
“The ‘I’m glad you came tonight’ part.”
So I’m not imagining the nudging or the sparks or what I could have sworn was his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand while we walked to his car. “Mmm. Well in that case, I meant what I said, too.”
He kicks a rock I’m two steps from tripping over out of my path. “You said the potholes in Leslie’s driveway suck.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“I feel his intense gaze skimming my face and force myself to look him in the eye. This time, when he leans closer, I know what he wants. He traces my jaw with his fingertips, then moves lower to my chin. My eyelids flutter closed when he tips my face up.
Oh my God. Sam Donavon is going to kiss me.
The forest holds its breath.
I hold my breath.
Our lips brush, light as eyelashes. His fingers trail back into my hair, tilting my head. Hot cinnamon dances across my mouth.
I’m drowning.
And then my name, roared at the top of familiar lungs, cracks the silent night.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“Nobody understands me better than my brother – they can’t, not without having lived the life we have. This is exactly why I love him and why, no matter how much I love Sam, I’m not sure I want to completely abandon my brother. Or whether I can.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
“How can I explain our relationship so the stylist gets it? It might not be normal, exactly, but it works for us. The kind of closeness we have can only happen when you grow up in a house like ours. When you know the one person in the world you can count on sleeps in a bed six feet away.”
― Kate Avelynn, quote from Flawed
Kate Avelynn
Born place: The United States
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“Schuyler put a gentle hand on Abbadon's feathered extensions, feeling the majestic power underneath their silky weight. She had been frightened once, to see him in this light, but now that she saw his terrifying face, she found it beautiful.”
― Melissa de la Cruz, quote from Misguided Angel
“The irony of the process of thought control: the more energy you put into trying to control your ideas and what you think about, the more your ideas end up controlling you.”
― Nassim Nicholas Taleb, quote from Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder
“The contrast between the realization of his neglect and the fondness I had for my father was painful".”
― Yangsze Choo, quote from The Ghost Bride
“Cece was all I had. Without her, I’d be totally alone in the world.
Oh, God. I probed her gentle face, her receptive dream state. What would I do without you?
Stop it, my brain screamed. She’s here with you now. Thats what matters.
I took a deep breath to quell my anxiety. Try to. I needed her. Cece was a part of me now. The me that felt solid and sure and strong. She was the one thing in my life that kept me going, made me happy.
And that happiness hadn't come without a price. I'd given up a lot to be with Cece: my home, friends, family. Maybe even my future family. Plus this sense of belonging I’d always had. The sense of fitting in, knowing where I stood. It might not be so bad if could be like her. Out. Proud. With a new place of belonging in the gay community. With new friends. A new family.
But what I’d lost was insignificant compared to what I’d found. Me. The missing part of myself. And Cece. Knowing love. Being loved.
“Please, God," I whispered into the night. “Let me be loved.”
Beside me, Cece whimpered a little and rolled onto her side. She snaked an arm around my hip and pulled me close. Cece gave me life, she nurtured me, and I burrowed into the warm cocoon of her. –Ch.22”
― Julie Anne Peters, quote from Keeping You a Secret
“No. But then the American Government--whatever branch--has never really grasped the concept of tribal identity.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, quote from Micah
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