Quotes from Explosive Eighteen

Janet Evanovich ·  305 pages

Rating: (62.4K votes)


“[Stephanie Plum]Jeez. No True Love"
[Grandma Mazur] There's always been true love, but in my day, you either talked yourself into thinking you had it, or you talked yourself into thinking you didn't need it.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“He had a body like batman”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“It wasn't exactly that Lula was fat. It was more that she was too short for her weight." - Stephanie Plum”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“As Stephanie and Lula were going after the bad guys, Lula was making preparations from the trunk of her Firebird. Stephanie looked inside and stopped breathing for a beat. "That's a rocket launcher!" "Yep," Lula said. "It's a big boy. I got it at a yard sale in the projects.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“DeAngelo blew up my bus, so I filled his car with shit. Genius, right?"
"DeAngelo didn't blow up the bus," Connie said. "I just got the report from the fire marshal. The coffeemaker shorted out and started the fire."
Some of the color left Vinnie's face. "Say what?"
"Oh man," Lula said. "DeAngelo is gonna be pissed. Least he won't know who did it."
"I left a note," Vinnie said.
Lula gave a hoot of laughter and fell off her chair.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen



“Yeah, but I want to take a look at your little peashooter. It's kinda cute."
"It's a gun," Brenda said.
Lula pulled her Glock out of her bag and aimed it at Brenda. "Bitch, this is a gun. It could put a hole in you big enough to drive a truck through.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“I was completely out of clean clothes. That meant I could be a slut and sleep naked , or I could be a slob and sleep in what I was wearing. Truth is, I'm not entirely comfortable sleeping naked. I do it from time to time, but I worry that God might be watching or that my mother might find out, and I'm pretty sure they both think nice girls should wear pyjamas to bed.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said:
"She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“I'd do the lifting, but I just got a manicure. And I notice you don't have a manicure at all. Only thing noticeable about your hands is the missing tan on your ring finger that I don't care about. -Lula”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“Connie, giving her thoughts on why Vinnie's hot temper is less than normal, says: "Lucille must have fed him a Vallium smoothie this morning.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen



“You have no spirit of culinary adventure. You need to be more like that snarky guy on the Travel Channel. He goes all over the world eating kangaroo a**holes and snail throw-up. He'd eat anything. He don't care how sick he gets. He's another one of my role models, except he needs ironing.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“Why do you gotta be going somewhere? Seems like it should be enough that we had nachos. And we got meaningful jobs. We catch bad guys. If it wasn't for us, there'd be vampires and all kinds of shit running around loose.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“It was so much easier when I was young. You got a boyfriend, and you married him. You had some kids, you got older, one of you died, and that was it.''Jeez. No true love?' 'There's always been true love, but in my day, you either talked yourself into thinking you had it, or you talked yourself into thinking you didn't need it.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“Lucille must have fed him a Vallium smoothie this morning.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“I sent Hal and Rafael to keep an eye on you, and I went to check on a commercial account in Whitehorse. Rafael called to tell me Lula went in with a rocket launcher, so I skipped Whitehorse. I pulled into the lot seconds before you destroyed Billings Foods.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen



“Ranger removed my goggles. “Would you like to come home with me?” I stepped away from him. “Thank you for the offer, but no. I’m done with men.” Ranger smiled. “Forever?” “Until I figure some things out.” “And if you don’t figure them out?” “If I can’t figure them out on my own, I’ll ask you to help me.” “Babe, that’s like the blind leading the blind.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“Ranger transferred the messenger bag from his shoulder to mine, pulled me into him, and kissed me like he meant it.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“It’s good to have a Ranger,” Lula said. “He’s like a personal Spidey.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“This makes you real special,” Lula said. “It’s like you’re a reality show, all by yourself.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen


“There was a lot of swearing and ineffective bitch-slapping,”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Explosive Eighteen



About the author

Janet Evanovich
Born place: in South River, New Jersey, The United States
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There was once an invisible man, the monster continued, though Conor kept his eyes firmly on Harry, who had grown tired of being unseen.
Conor set himself into a walk.
A walk after Harry.
It was not that he was actually invisible, the monster said, following Conor, the room volume dropping as they passed. It was that the people had become used to not seeing him.
"Hey!" Conor called. Harry didn't turn around. Neither did Sully nor Anton, though thet were still sniggering as Conor picked up his pace.
And if no one sees you, the monster said, picking up its pace, too, are you really there at all?
"HEY!" Conor called loudly.
The dining hall had fallen silent now, as Conor and the monster moved faster after Harry.
Harry who had still not turned around.
Conor reached him and grabbed him by the shoulder, twisting him round. Harry pretended to question what had happened, looking hard at Sully, acting like he was the one who'd done it. "Quit messing about," Harry said and turned away again.
Turned away from Conor.
And then one day the invisible man decided, the monster said, its voice ringing in Conor's ears, I will make them see me.
"How?" Conor asked, breathing heavily again, not turning back to see the monster standing there, not looking at the reaction of the room to the huge monster now in the midst, though he was aware of nervous murmurs and a strange anticipation in the air. "How did the man do it?"
Conor could feel the monster close behind him, knew that it was kneeling, knew that it was putting its face up to his ear to whisper into in, to tell him the rest of the story.
He called, it said for a monster.
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