Quotes from Dogshit Saved My Life

Karl Wiggins ·  381 pages

Rating: (134 votes)


“I’m thinking of starting my own Fat Club. Talking to Sue it sounds like money for old rope. £15 membership and fleece them for another fiver every time they come along to get weighed”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


“Maxims of Ptahhotep spoke a lot of sense; 'Do not be arrogant because of your knowledge, but confer with the ignorant man as with the learned. Good speech is more hidden than malachite, yet it is found in the possession of women slaves at the millstones.' Now THAT I’ll give the green light to. The opinions, eloquence and articulacy of the man or woman on the street can often be as invaluable as precious stones.”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


“I hate the check-in staff at airports who ask stupid questions like, “Could anyone have put anything into your bag without you knowing?” The answer is obviously yes because if they’d put it in without me knowing I wouldn’t fucking know it, would I?”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


“It’s got fuck all to do with being racist. I don’t care if he’s purple or orange or fucking yellow with pink spots! Although if he’s yellow with pink spots perhaps we should call a first aider. All I care about is his CSCS card and this Home Office card that is now in my possession”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


“Quotes from Ancient Greece are mostly all bollocks”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life



“The opinions, eloquence and articulacy of the man or woman on the street can often be as invaluable as precious stones”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


“Put your glasses on mate ….. Come down from there, you’re gonna kill yourself …. Well, what does your Method Statement say? …. Right, let’s get you re-inducted. You need a reminder of site rules ….. Where are your outriggers, mate? ….. Put your glasses on ….. Put your glasses on …. Put your glasses on …. Oh, they steam up, do they? I’ve never heard that one before …. Where’s your mask? If you breathe this shit in you’re going to kill yourself. Silicosis is incurable ….. Right STOP! Do not reverse another inch without a banksman ….. Don’t put your glasses on just because you see me walk around the corner. They won’t protect MY eyes …. Hook yourself on, what’s the matter with you? Are all you scaffolders superhuman or something? ….. Put your glasses on ….. Oi! What stops me walking right in there? Where’s your barriers and signage? ….. Oi! I’m getting showered in fucking sparks here. And so is that can of petrol ….. Put your glasses on …. Where’s the flashback arrestor on this bottle of propane? ….. Hey, pal, stop welding until you’ve sheeted up ….. What are you doing climbing up there? Where’s your supervisor? What did he say about access in this morning’s Safe Start briefing? Nothing? Right, he can sit through another induction tomorrow ….. Where are the retaining pins to the joint clamps in this concrete pump line? SEAMUS! Fucking deal with this, will you? ….Put your glasses on …. Hey! Hey! Come here! Why have you got a nail instead of an ‘R’ clip to the quick-hitch system on your excavator bucket? NO! IT WON’T DO! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? If that bucket falls on someone they’re not going to get up again. And you trust a fucking nail to hold it in position! Take this machine out of service immediately until you’ve got the proper ‘R’ clip! ….. Put your glasses on …. Where’s the edge protection. Who removed the edge protection? Right, let me phone for a scaffolder ….. Put your glasses on ….. Oi! Get out from under there! Never, ever stand underneath a suspended load. Even if all the equipment’s been inspected, which it obviously has, you can never trust the crane driver. He can be taken ill suddenly ….. Come here, mate, let’s have a little chat. Why are you working on Fall Arrest? You’re supposed to be working on Fall Restraint (FR ‘restrains’ you going near the perimeter edge of the building, FA ‘arrests’ your fall if, well, if you fall. If you’re hanging off a building we’ve got less than ten minutes to reach you before you start going into toxic shock brought on by suspension trauma. In other words, we need a Rescue Plan, which is why we’d prefer people work on Fall Restraint)”
― Karl Wiggins, quote from Dogshit Saved My Life


About the author

Karl Wiggins
Born place: in The United Kingdom
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“Mas don Rigoberto sabia que não havia outro remédio, tinha que se resignar e esperar. Provavelmente as únicas brigas do casal ao longo de todos os anos que estavam juntos foram causadas pelos atrasos de Lucrecia sempre que iam sair, para onde fosse, um cinema, um jantar, uma exposição, fazer compras, uma operação bancária, uma viagem. No começo, quando começaram a morar juntos, recém-casados, ele pensava que sua mulher demorava por mera inapetência e desprezo pela pontualidade. Tiveram discussões, desavenças, brigas por causa disso. Pouco a pouco, do Rigoberto, observando-a, refletindo, entendeu que esses atrasos da esposa na hora de sair para qualquer compromisso não eram uma coisa superficial, um desleixo de mulher orgulhosa. Obedeciam a algo mais profundo, um estado ontológico da alma, porque, sem que ela tivesse consciência do que lhe ocorria, toda vez que precisava sair de algum lugar, da sua própria casa, a de uma amiga que estava visitando, o restaurante onde acabara de jantar, era dominada por uma inquietação recôndita, uma insegurança, um medo obscuro, primitivo, de ter que ir embora, sair dali, mudar de lugar, e então inventava todo tipo de pretextos - pegar um lenço, trocar a bolsa, procurar as chaves, verificar se as janelas estavam bem fechadas, a televisão desligada, se o fogão não estava acesso ou o telefone fora do gancho -, qualquer coisa que atrasasse por alguns minutos ou segundos a pavorosa ação de partir.
Ela sempre foi assim? Quando era pequena também? Não se atreveu a perguntar. Mas já havia constatado que, com o passar dos anos, esse prurido, mania ou fatalidade se acentuava, a tal ponto que Rigoberto às vezes pensava, com um calafrio, que talvez chegasse o dia que Lucrecia, com a mesma benignidade do personagem de Melville, ia contrair a letargia ou indolência metafísica de Bartleby e decidir não mais sair da sua casa, quem sabe do seu quarto e até da sua cama. "Medo de abandonar o ser, de perder o ser, de ficar sem seu ser", pensou mais uma vez. Era o diagnóstico que havia chegado em relação aos atrasos da esposa.”
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“The truth was that history—and in Indochina we were on the wrong side of it—was a hard taskmaster and from the early to the middle sixties, when we were making those fateful decisions, we had almost no choices left. Our options had been steadily closing down since 1946, when the French Indochina War began. That was when we had the most options, and the greatest element of choice. But we had granted, however reluctantly, the French the right to return and impose their will on the Vietnamese by force; and by 1950, caught up increasingly in our own global vision of anti-Communism, we chose not to see this war as primarily a colonial/anticolonial war, and we had begun to underwrite most of the French costs. Where our money went our rhetoric soon followed. We adjusted our public statements, and much of our journalism, to make it seem as if this was a war of Communists against anti-Communists, instead, as the people of Vietnam might have seen it, a war of a colonial power against an indigenous nationalist force. By the time the Kennedy-Johnson team arrived and started talking about all their options, like it or not (and they did not even want to think about it) they had in fact almost no options at all.”
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