Christopher Moore · 256 pages
Rating: (37.3K votes)
“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“By Aladdin's lamplit scrotum, man! Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“The netherworld is timeless and unchanging, and boring -- much like a doctor's waiting room.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Slowly and gently, Augustus Brine explained to the king of the Djinn about the illusion created by motion pictures. When he finished, he felt like he had just raped the tooth fairy in front of a class of kindergartners.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Rachel could not believe what she was hearing. Accepting that her magic worked was a huge step, yet she was speaking to the evidence. But to be offered the power to rule the world? She wasn't sure her career in exercise instruction had prepared her for this.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“In business, as in politics, the public is ever so tolerant of those who slime.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“In Breeze’s business one got used to running across the skeletons in people’s closets. If Billy’s skeleton wore women’s underwear, it didn’t really matter. Homosexuality on Billy Winston was like acne on a leper.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Everyone at the bar turned toward The Breeze and waited, as if the next few words he spoke would reveal the true meaning of life, the winning numbers of the lottery, and the unlisted phone number of God.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“For the tourist, immersed in the oblivion of vacation spending, Cypress Street provided a bonanza of curious gifts to prove to the folks back home that they had been somewhere. Somewhere where they had obviously forgotten that soon they would return home to a mortgage, dental bills, and an American Express bill that would descend at the end of the month like a financial Angel of Death. And they bought. They bought effigies of”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“He had tapped into the Zen of ignorance, the enlightenment of absurdity.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“The garlic bread lay there between them, steaming with implications. They, of course, must both eat it or neither could. Garlic bread meant garlic breath. There might be a kiss later, maybe more. There was just too damn much intimacy in garlic bread.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Creatures of the night were rising from their resting places and venturing forth to feed on their unsuspecting victims.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“To say that Effrom was not a particularly good cook was an understatement akin to saying that genocide is not a particularly effective public relations strategy.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Die Behauptung, daß Effrom nicht besonders gut kochen konnte, war eine Untertreibung von ähnlichem Kaliber wie die Feststellung, daß es sich bei Völkermord um eine nicht besonders erfolgversprechende PR-Strategie handele.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“»Du hast Heiden vernichtet? Ich dachte, die Erdgeister seien wohlgesinnt.«
»Jeder hat mal Aussetzer.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“Das Leben war Handeln, es gab keinen Frieden diesseits des Grabes.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“»Das Prinzip Moral verstehe ich nicht.«
»Das überrascht mich nicht im geringsten.«”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
“doch ihre Gegenwart hatte in ihm stets das Gefühl ausgelöst, daß seine eheliche Treue lediglich eine absurde Wahnvorstellung war.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from Practical Demonkeeping
Christopher Moore
Born place: in Toledo, Ohio, The United States
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“the will of God will never lead you where the grace of God cannot keep you. I”
― Neil T. Anderson, quote from Victory Over the Darkness
“Life is so good, and it gets better every day.”
― quote from Life is So Good
“A person who has had the misfortune to fall victim to the spell of a philosophical system (and the spells of sorcerers are mere trifles in comparison to the disastrous effect of the spell of a philosophical system!) can no longer see the world, or people, or historic events, as they are; he sees everything only through the distorting prism of the system by which he is possessed. Thus, a Marxist of today is incapable of seeing anything else in the history of mankind other than the “class struggle”.
What I am saying concerning mysticism, gnosis, magic and philosophy would be considered by him only as a ruse on the part of the bourgeois class, with the aim of “screening with a mystical and idealistic haze” the reality of the exploitation of the proletariat by the bourgeoisie…although I have not inherited anything from my parents and I have not experienced a single day without having to earn my living by means of work recognised as “legitimate” by Marxists!
Another contemporary example of possession by a system is Freudianism. A man possessed by this system will see in everything that I have written only the expression of “suppressed libido”, which seeks and finds release in this manner. It would therefore be the lack of sexual fulfillment which has driven me to occupy myself with the Tarot and to write about it!
Is there any need for further examples? Is it still necessary to cite the Hegelians with their distortion of the history of humanity, the Scholastic “realists” of the Middle Ages with the Inquisition, the rationalists of the eighteenth century who were blinded by the light of their own autonomous reasoning?
Yes, autonomous philosophical systems separated from the living body of tradition are parasitic structures, which seize the thought, feeling and finally the will of human beings. In fact, they play a role comparable to the psycho-pathological complexes of neurosis or other psychic maladies of obsession. Their physical analogy is cancer.”
― quote from Meditations on the Tarot: A Journey into Christian Hermeticism
“When a massive failure to preserve the integrity of an ecosystem occured, no one escaped the consequences.”
― Terry Brooks, quote from The Gypsy Morph
“Honestly, dear heart, you've got to curb this unhealthy tendency to blow things up.”
― Shelley Adina, quote from Lady of Devices
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