“You were just worried about me."
An exhale, relieved that I had understood. "Yeah"
I turned. "Because you think I'm worth it"
He put his fingers under my chin. "I absolutely think your worth it."
"But you don't think you are."
His mouth opened. Shut.
"That's what this is about, Derek. You won't let us worry about you because you don't think you're worth it. But I do. I absolutely do.”
“So I was right, wasn't I? It's still you, even in wolf form.'
He grunted.
No sudden uncontrollable urges to go kill something?'
He rolled his eyes.
Hey, you're the one who was worried.' I paused. 'And I don't smell like dinner, right?'
I got a real look for that one.
Just covering all the bases.”
“So," I said. "Seems you're going to be stuck with me for a while."
He smiled. A real smile that lit up his whole face.
"Good,”
“You know children, always playing with the forces of darkness.”
“He was trying to tell me something."
Derek snorted. "Aren’t they all? Must be a rule in the ghost handbook—if in danger of evaporating, make sure you’re in the middle of a dire pronouncement.”
“Stupid bitch,' Tori muttered. 'oh let's take the necromancer with the superpowers to the cemetery. Of course you aren't going to raise the dead, you silly girl.”
“So," Simon said. "Looks like you and Derek are getting along again. What happened? Did he give you the look?"
"Look?"
"You know. The one that makes him look like a whipped puppy, and makes you feel like a jerk for doing the whipping."
"Ah, that one. So it works on you, too?"
He snorted. "It even works on Dad. We give in, we tell him it's okay, and the next thing you know, he's chewing up slippers again."
I laughed.”
“And he says I have lousy timing”
“I glanced up to see Liz and smiled. "Thank you."
"I just went along for the ride. After that happened-" She waved at Derek. "You know how blind people need Seeing Eye dogs? Well, apparently werewolves could really use Opening Door poltergeists.”
“And now we can't," I said. "Which sucks, but the main thing is that your dad's alive."
He smiled, hesitant at first, then a blazing grin broke through that made my heart stop. I recovered and grinned back and went to throw my arms around his neck, then stopped, blushing. Before I could pull back, he caught my elbows and put my arms around his neck and pulled me into a hug.
Then he jumped, chair swiveling so fast I nearly went flying. I heard footsteps in the hall and I scrambled off his lap just as Simon swung in, breathing heavily, like he'd come running.”
“Derek and I went out for our walk after dinner. Alone.
There was an open field behind the motel and we headed there. Finally, when we were far enough from the motel, Derek led me into a little patch of woods. He hesitated then, unsure, still just holding my hand. When I stepped in front of him, though, his free hand went around my waist.
"So," I said. "Seems you're going to be stuck with me for a while."
He smiled. A real smile that lit up his whole face.
"Good," he said.
He pulled me against him. Then he bent down, breath warming my lips. My pulse was racing so fast I could barely breathe. I was sure he'd stop again and I tensed, waiting for that hesitation, stomach twisting. His lips touched mine, and still I kept waiting for him to pull back.
His lips pressed against mine, then parted. And he kissed me. Really kissed me- arms tightening around me, mouth moving against mine, firm, like he'd made up his mind that this was what he wanted and he wasn't backing down again.
I slid my arms around his neck. His tightened around me and he scooped me up, lifting me off his feet, kissing me like he was never going to stop, and I kissed him back the same way, like I didn't want him to ever stop.
It was a perfect moment, one where nothing else mattered. All I could feel was him. All I could taste was his kiss. All I could hear was the pounding of his heart. All I could think about was him, and how much I wanted this, and how incredibly lucky I was to get it, and how tight I was going to hold onto it.
This was what I wanted. This guy. This life. This me. I was never getting my old life back, and I didn't care. I was happy. I was safe. I was right where I wanted to be.”
“Great. So if I saw a guy standing still, and he wasn't wearing an old uniform, I just had to ask him to walk through furniture. If he stared at me like I was crazy, then I'd know he wasn't a ghost. - Chloe”
“We had one gun, one werewolf, one poltergeist, one supercharged spell-caster, one not-so-supercharged spell-caster, and one perfectly useless necromancer, though Liz was quick to remind me that she needed me to relay her words. - Chloe”
“Screw caution," Tori said. "I'm outta here." We looked at her. "Well, I am. As long as someone comes with me." We kept looking at her. She sighed. "Fine, but when everything goes to hell, just remember, I get to blame you guys, because I wanted to leave right away.”
“You're crying?" he said.
"No, I- " I tore my gaze away. "Just dust. From the path. Simon's that way."
I tried to pass him, but he stooped, trying to get a loom of my face. When I wouldn't let him, he caught my chin. I jerked back, flinching at his touch, heart thudding at it, too.
I told myself Simon was wrong. I'd never be dumb enough to fall for Derek. But I had. With him so close, my stomach kept doing weird flips. It wasn't fear. It hadn't been fear for awhile.
"You have been crying," he said, voice softer.”
“Derek looked around, like he was searching for something to use. Then he stripped off his shirt. I tried not to look away. Not that he looked bad without his shirt. The opposite, actually, which is why...Let's just say friends are really better when they're fully clothed.”
“They found me at the kitchen table. Derek said, "There's something we need to tell you," and from the look on Andrew's face, I think he expected Derek to say he'd gotten me pregnant.”
“I slid closer, feeling his arms close around me, tightening. Our lips touched--
"Derek?" his dad called. "Chloe?"
Derek let out a growl. I laughed and backed up.
"We seem to get a lot of that, don't we?" I said.
"Too much. After we eat, we're going for a walk. A long walk. Far from every possible interruption."
I grinned up at him. "Sounds like a plan”
“Was she telling you to stay away from me?" I asked.
He paused, then said, "Yeah." He squeezed my hand out of Aunt Lauren's sight. "It's okay. We're good."
Chloe and Derek”
“I let her through. She checked Derek's pulse and his breathing, saying both seemed okay, then leaned down to his face.
"Nothing weird on his breath. Smells . . . like toothpaste."
Derek's eyes opened, and the first thing he saw was Tori's face inches from his. He jumped and let out an oath. Simon cracked up. I madly motioned for him to be quiet.
"Are you okay?" I asked Derek.
"He is now," Simon said. "After Tori jump-started his heart.”
“You were just worried about me."
An exhale, relieved that I'd understood. "Yeah."
I turned. "Because you think I'm worth it."
He put his fingers under my chin. "I absolutley think you're worth it."
"But you don't think you are."
His mouth opened. Shut.
"That's what this is about, Derek. You won't let us worry about you because you don't think you're worth it. But I do. I absolutley do.
I lifted onto my toes, put my hands around his neck, and pulled him down. When our lips met, that first jolt...It was everything I hadn't felt with Simon, everything I'd wanted to feel.
His hands went around my waist, pulling me closer--
Simon's footsteps thudded through the hall. We jumped apart.
"And he says I have lousy timing," Derek grumbled.”
“I'm not going anywhere, not without Chloe."
Derek”
“He lunged again. This time I stood my ground and he checked his leap at the last second....and toppled sideways. I didn't hide my laugh that time. His face twisted fast, grabbed my pajama leg and wrenched, and down I went.
"Bully”
“I found something" Simon said as he walked in. He whipped out an old-fashioned key from his pocket and grinned at me. "It was taped to the back of my dresser drawer. What do you think? Buried treasure? Secret passageway? Locked room where they keep crazy old Aunt Edna?"
"It probaly unlocks another dresser," Tori said. "One they threw out fifty years ago."
"Its tragic, being born without an imagination. Do they hold telethons for that?”
“He turned my way, and I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I didn't notice for a second. Then I realized I was staring at him, and looked away fast, cheeks flaming. I could feel him looking at me. Frowning slightly, like he was trying to figure something out. Before he could, I gulped my warm water and said, "Must be almost lunchtime," which was a stupid thing to say, but all I could think of. It took him a moment before he answered, shrugging and saying, "Maybe." Then, " You okay?"
I nodded.
"You want to talk about what happened downstairs? With Banks?"
I nodded again.
"I should get Simon," he said. "He'll want to know."
Another nod, but he didn't move, just watched me as I kept sipping the warm water.
"Chloe."
I took my time looking up, certain he'd figured out what I'd been thinking and was about to let me down gently. He wouldn't say, " Sorry, I'm not interested, " because that wouldn't be Derek- too presumptious- but he'd find some way to convey the same message, as I had with Simon. I like you. I just don't like you that way.
"Chloe?"
I looked up than, and what I saw in his eyes-- my hands fumbled the glass, and I dropped it, water spalashing over me, soaking my jeans. I scrambled to catch that glass before it hit the floor, barely making it, on one knee, prize gripped firmly in my hand. And I was still there when I felt the glass being tugged from my fingers. I looked up to see Derek crouching in front of me, his face inches from mine. He leaned forward and--
"What'd you lose?"
Simon's voice came from the doorway, and we shot to our feet so fast we collided.”
“He blocked me. " What'd you do, Chloe?"
I sidestepped. He sidesteped.
"You like him, don't you?" he said.
"Yes, I like him. Just not..."
"Not what?"
"Talk to Simon. He's the one who thinks..."
"Thinks what?"
Step. Block.
"Thinks what?"
"That there's someone else," I blurted before I could stop myself. I took a deep, shuddering breath. "He thinks there's someone else."
"Who?"
I was going to say I don't know. Some guy from school, I guess. But Derek's expression already knew the answer. The look on his face...It'd been humiliating before, having Simon accuse me of liking Derek, but that was nothing compared to how I felt when I saw Derek's look. Not just surprise, but shock. Shock and horror.
"Me?" he said. "Simon said he thinks you and I are-"
"No, not that. He knows we aren't-"
"Good. So what does he think?"
"That I like you." Again, the words flew out before I could stop them.”
“I had a stupid crush on a guy who barely tolerated me most of the time. Was that the kind of girl I was? Pick the jerk over the nice guy?”
“How'd you communicate?"
"Paper and pen. Amazing inventions. Anyway, once we were in Buffalo, I led him here. We couldn't figure out a way in and he got stressed and apparently that" -- she waved at him--- "is what happens when a werewolf gets stressed. By then, the garage door was open, some staff guy bringing in a car. He took one look at Derek and decided it was time for a new job”
“I screwed up. Again. You're shocked, I'm sure.”
“Chloe? It's me." After a pause, he added, "Derek," like I could mistake that deep rumble for anyone else, like I could mistake that little part of me that perked up like an eager puppy saying, "It's him. Quick! Go see what he wants."
God, how had I been so blind? It seemed so obvious now.”
“The essence of wisdom is to know when to be doing, and when it's useless even to try”
“I Knew a Woman"
I knew a woman, lovely in her bones,
When small birds sighed, she would sigh back at them;
Ah, when she moved, she moved more ways than one:
The shapes a bright container can contain!
Of her choice virtues only gods should speak,
Or English poets who grew up on Greek
(I’d have them sing in chorus, cheek to cheek).
How well her wishes went! She stroked my chin,
She taught me Turn, and Counter-turn, and Stand;
She taught me Touch, that undulant white skin;
I nibbled meekly from her proffered hand;
She was the sickle; I, poor I, the rake,
Coming behind her for her pretty sake
(But what prodigious mowing we did make).
Love likes a gander, and adores a goose:
Her full lips pursed, the errant note to seize;
She played it quick, she played it light and loose;
My eyes, they dazzled at her flowing knees;
Her several parts could keep a pure repose,
Or one hip quiver with a mobile nose
(She moved in circles, and those circles moved).
Let seed be grass, and grass turn into hay:
I’m martyr to a motion not my own;
What’s freedom for? To know eternity.
I swear she cast a shadow white as stone.
But who would count eternity in days?
These old bones live to learn her wanton ways:
(I measure time by how a body sways).”
“I have been conditioned by Philip Morris," he said with a smile.”
“Olivia," he sighed as he held her tight against him. "I like the way you leap."
For once her laughter was free and easy. "And I like the way you catch me when I land.”
“Wherever we go, there seems to be only one business at hand - that of finding workable compromises between the sublimity of our ideas and the absurdity of the fact of us.”
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