Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

Keep thinking back about what Mum said about being real and the Velveteen Rabbit book (though frankly have had enough trouble with rabbits in this particular house). My favorite book, she claims of which I have no memory was about how little kids get one toy that they love more than all the others, and even when its fur has been rubbed off, and it's gone saggy with bits missing, the little child still thinks it's the most beautiful toy in the world, and can't bear to be parted from it. That's how it works, when people really love each other, Mum whispered on the way out in the Debenhams lift, as if she was confessing some hideous and embarrassing secret. But, the thing is, darling, it doesn't happen to ones who have sharp edges, or break if they get dropped, or ones made of silly synthetic stuff that doesn't last. You have to be brave and let the other person know who you are and what you feel.

9p.m. My flat. Feel very strange and empty. Is all very well thinking everything is going to be different when you come back but then it is all the same. Suppose I have to make it different. But what am I going to do with my life? I know. Will eat some cheese.

One minute you're closer to someone than anyone in the whole world, next minute they need only to say the words 'time apart', 'serious talk' or 'maybe you...' and you're never going to see them again and will have to spend the next six months having imaginary conversations in which they beg to come back, and bursting into tears at the sight of their toothbrush.

What is it about mothers and the phone which, immediately you say you have to go, makes them think of nineteen completely irrelevant things they have to tell you that minute?

Jude: Just as you are? Not thinner? Not cleverer? Not with slightly bigger breasts or slightly smaller nose? Bridget: No. Shazzer: Well, fuck me. Tom: This is someone you hate right? Bridget: Yes, yes, I hate him.

All got really plastered after that. Was completely fantastic evening. As Tom said, if Miss Havisham had had some jolly flatmates to take the piss out of her she would never have stayed so long in her wedding dress.

I mean, I haven't rushed to the answerphone once to see if anyone's aware of my existence in the world!

She's a jellyfisher: You have a conversation with her that seems all nice and friendly, then you suddenly feel like you've been stung and you don't know where it came from.

Weightless (in air), alcohol units 8 (but in-flight so canceled out by altitude), cigarettes 0 (desperate: no-smoking seat), calories 1 million (entirely made up of things would never have dreamt of putting in self's mouth were they not on in-flight tray), farts from traveling companion 38 (so far), variations in fart aroma 0.

zdjęcia księcia Williama mogłabym oglądać w ilościach hurtowych, najlepiej w całej gamie strojów, ale oczywiście zdaję sobie sprawę z tego, że żądza ta jest czymś niepożądanym i niewłaściwym

Odio el comportamiento pasivo-agresivo del teléfono en el mundo moderno de las citas, utilizando la no comunicación como forma de comunicación. Es terrible, terrible: una llamada o la ausencia de ésta marca la diferencia entre el amor y la amistad, o entre la felicidad y ser dejada a tu suerte en la despiadada guerra de trincheras de las citas, exactamente en la misma situación que antes pero sintiéndote incluso más jodida que la última vez.

Una chica puede casarse con cualquiera cuando tiene dieciocho años. Pero cuando a formado su carácter, aceptar la realidad e un hombre tiene que parecer insufrible.

¡Sencillamente, no podemos definir nuestra propia individualidad en términos de si estamos o no con otra persona!¡Deberíamos celebrar lo fantástico que es ser libre!

Get out. You’ve had the warning sign, he votes Tory. Now get out before you get too involved.

The point is you are supposed to vote for the principle of the thing, not the itsy-bitsy detail about this percent and that percent.